How to deal with rejection
No one wants to experience it, but at some point or the other we may all have to deal with being rejected by someone we had romantic sights set on.
Ivret Williams, counselling psychologist, said knowing how to deal with rejection and what to do about it will help you to cope and recover more quickly.
Below she shares the steps you can take:
1. Assess the situation
According to Williams, it’s best to assess the situation with the person who rejected you. “One of the things you have to do is analyse who rejected you and the character of the person,” she said. She said the person may have determined that you both were not compatible. “Some people reject you because you are more successful than they are, or vice versa, or because you are not compatible with their lifestyle choices,” she said.
If you have been given a reason for the rejection, assess that reason. If you have not been given a reason, ask for one.
2. Acknowledge that you were rejected
“You have to acknowledge that you were rejected,” Williams said. To get over a rejection, one has to accept the fact, as it is through acceptance that you do not become caught in a state of denial, and continue trying to get the attention of the other person.
3. Get out of the house!
Don’t lock yourself away, which can lead to depression. Go out, mingle, meet new people, network, and seek someone new to start a new relationship with. “Don’t forget that one person may have rejected you, but there are thousands who would love to have you,” Williams said.
4. Stop the hurt, anger and sadness
After being rejected, it is normal for you to feel hurt, angry or sad. However, it’s important to quell these feelings as soon as possible.
5. Seek comfort in others
After being rejected, it is best to surround yourself with positive individuals who love you and have your best interests at heart. They will remind you of the true reasons for living.
6. Pray about it
Williams said one of the best ways to get over rejection is to pray. Seeking comfort in the Almighty is one of the best ways to move forward. Go on your knees, have a conversation with God about what happened, express yourself, and ask Him for guidance.
7. Write about it
“After you’ve prayed about it, you can write about it,” said Williams. “Write the person a letter and then destroy it.”
8. Evaluate yourself
Williams said it’s highly recommended that you conduct a self-evaluation while handling rejection. From self-evaluation, you can identify your strengths and your weaknesses.
9. Compliment yourself
The onus is on you to identify your strong points, even if the other person may not have seen them.
10. Seek counselling
If you have tried all options above and you’re still struggling, counselling may be the next option.
