Is your man old-fashioned in bed? Get some Fifty Shades action without having an affair

NOTHING beats tradition — it’s the safe escape and you will hardly receive flak. But when it comes to being in a satisfactory relationship, going against the grain might be the best thing.

Too often we hear of affairs or the end of romances because of infidelity, and further investigation may reveal one partner being dissatisfied with the level of action in the bedroom.

But how can a dissatisfied partner get some Fifty Shades action without having an affair?

Denecia Green, author of Lies Sex and Betrayal, told All Woman that one way involves exploring props to create a new feel for you and your partner.

“Adding props to the bedroom creates a new sensation that will also re-energise your partner,” Green said. “For example, ice cubes create a whole variation of sensations when rubbed across certain body parts such as the nipples or the back of your neck. Popping a small cube in your mouth during oral sex may also send your partner through the roof.”

Green suggests using other props such as a scarf, neck tie or handcuff to hold your partner captive while you tease him mercilessly.

“Try having him tied to the bed frame or headboard while you tantalise his body. This same prop may be used as a blindfold. Having your sight cut off heightens your other senses and the anticipation of not knowing what happens next will drive you wild,” she said.

She added that sex toys are also excellent props to spice up the bedroom. Other tips include:

1. Having sex in various places

According to Green, you can spice things up by having sex in places other than your bed. “Try the floor, a countertop, in the car, outdoors, on a desk in his personal office — just about anywhere you can imagine,” she said.

2. Exploring actions society considers taboo

“Ladies, we can do many things with our mouths and tongues,” Green said.

3. Switch it up and be aggressive

Green said it’s perfectly fine for a woman to boss her man around in the bedroom and take his package by force from time to time. She added that the partner may use his hand or a whip to spank her during sex, which is quite OK, and added that a solid pull on the hair during sex also spices things up. “Choking, slapping across the face or pushing against a wall are also things to experiment with. Getting busy against a wall brings out an intense gotta-have-you-now thrill. Just be sure to let your partner know when you have reached your pain threshold,” Green said.

4. Embracing quickies

Green said quickies are always fun because they are spontaneous and open the appetite for the real deal later. “So pick a random place and embrace it.”

5. Watching pornography

“Be daring and let go of your inhibitions. Watch a few minutes of porn with your partner before foreplay. Make things interesting by trying to imitate the actions of the porn stars or better yet, try to outdo them. This will add fiery fervour to your bump and grind,” Green said.

Additionally, relationship counsellor Wayne Powell suggested that you:

1. Set up a date night and start the foreplay activities the morning before.

2. Watch a sensuous movie together.

3. Read a sensuous novel together.

4. Do some role play — for example, doctor and patient.

5. Get one of those Kama Sutra books and experiment every night.

6. Create a fruit salad on your partner’s body and enjoy the meal afterwards.