Deadbeat dad won’t support his child

Dear Mrs Macaulay,

My daughter is now 10 years old. My babyfather left when I was two months pregnant, stating that he had started a new relationship and couldn’t deal with the situation. He told me to get an abortion and get out of his life. This was after six years of a continuous relationship. This baby was a miracle given the fact that the doctor said that I had endometriosis and was classified as infertile. I went ahead and had my child. After the birth I called him and he came to the hospital to see if it was really his child. One year after, he found the love of his life and had his second child. He supported that child for a few years then left her for the same reason that he left mine. I took him to court in 2007 and the judge issued an order for him to pay $2,500 per week for maintenance (which he would place in a bank account). He paid this for a couple of months then stopped. He changed his address and workplace. I found out where he was living and subsequently served him court papers, taking him back to court in 2013. The judge ordered him once again to pay the maintenance and all the arrears which was owed. Afterwards he moved house and because of where he is now working, we cannot access the compound. He places monies in the account (not the amount ordered by the court) as he feels like — sometimes none at all. For the past 10 years, he only saw my daughter once as he claims he is always busy. But when we went to court he lied to the judge, claiming that I was keeping her away from him. This has caused stress on my finances. I currently have a lot of debt. l need some help in terms of what I can do. I have exhausted my options.

It is so unfortunate that the person who fathered your child when you had been classified as infertile is the ultimate example of the most selfish, unreliable and irresponsible example of an adult male. Such a person will never willingly own up to nor meet his responsibilities.

I see that you had the court order him to pay maintenance into a bank account. This was a mistake for someone like him. You ought to have asked the court to order that he pay the sums to the collections officer of the court.

You say that he pays whatever sums of money he feels like, and then sometimes or none at all, therefore continuing to be in breach of the court order. You also add that for the past 10 years he has only seen his daughter once. I trust that you told the court what was the true position in terms of his interest in the child.

I do understand what your burden must be like in these circumstances and that you would become indebted financially as a result.

But my dear, frustrated mother, you have certainly not exhausted the only option which you have, which is to go back to the court and take out a default process against him for all the arrears owed by him. You should apply for a variation so as to get an increase in the sum of maintenance due for your child and for an order that he make the payments to the collections officer of the court, or that a garnishee order be made for the sums to be deducted from his salary by his employers and paid into court.

You have only, in the course of 10 years, taken him to court to meet his legal obligation as a father twice. This is nothing in the general course of these types of proceedings, especially with this kind of father.

So madam, go back to the court and go back as often and as frequently as you have to if he disobeys the orders. I can assure you that when the judge is tired of his false promises and his disobedience in failing to provide for his child, he will be locked up and then he would take the matter seriously.

Remember, you owe it to your child to fight for her rights. Good luck to both of you.