Where have the real men gone?
Over the past couple of years I have heard testimonies from many young women who have concerns about their future. This is due to the dearth of good prospects — a number of men are in the gambling shops, addicted to drugs, in the prisons, on the street corners kneading their palms, or are in the business of begging. The exceptional few are not ready for the type of commitment that includes marriage. This leaves women asking, where have the real men gone?
Are there real men around? What are some of their identifying characteristics?
1. Committed
A real man is committed to whatever he does. He is not afraid to put himself out there in spite of the odds, and regardless of what friends, community or society says. If he is with you, he gives his all once he believes you are worth it. Likewise, he is committed to his job and his family.
2. Faithful
He is comfortable with the idea of having only one partner; he chooses to be faithful to that woman for the length of the relationship. He is man enough to turn down offers, no matter how many women throw themselves at him.
3. Humble
He admits when he is wrong and tries to make amends. He does not add insult to injury by bringing up irrelevant or unassociated issues to deflect attention from himself.
4. Provider
The Bible says that the man is the provider; therefore a real man works to provide for his family and is independent. Many men today sit around waiting for the woman to work and support them financially. Which Bible are they reading? A real man works and provides for his family.
5. Helps with household chores
He does not only provide financial support, he helps around the house as well, whether it be cooking every now and again, helping with the dishes, cleaning up after himself, or helping with the children.
6. Pleases his partner
Pleasing his queen is a routine part of his life; it does not require a special occasion. He buys chocolates, takes her on dates, and even buys articles of clothing that he thinks she will like, or that he wants to see her in. He remembers special occasions such as her birthday and makes them special (even on a tight budget) because he recognises that sometimes it’s not about how much you spend, but the thought and significance behind the smallest gestures.
7. Supportive
Her dreams become his. He provides support, guidance, encouragement, motivation and drive. Because when she succeeds, he succeeds.
8. Maintains his children
He recognises that should the relationship with the mother of his children end, his relationship with, and responsibility towards his children does not. He therefore continues to carry out his fatherly responsibilities, putting his children before his pride and ego.
9. Practises chivalry
Opening doors and pulling out chairs for his mate are not outdated actions, but quite normal.
10. Takes pride in self
He takes pride in his appearance and represents himself and his partner well in public.
A man ought to be ambitious, self-confident, and hardworking. He should be a role model for his children. Patience, temperance, and good communication skills should be high on his list of characteristics.
Fathers ought to train their boys to be courteous and respectful towards women and to be responsible heads of the household. Mothers must learn to wean their young adult sons and not continue to provide them with sustained financial support way into their adult lives.
And women, we ought to appreciate and treat with respect men who are polite and courteous, men who are ambitious, and men who provide for their children. They are a rare bunch.