When looking for love…
For those of you who are looking for love, the search can sometimes be frustrating, even more so when there’s a race against time.
And sometimes there’s need to take a step backwards and evaluate where you are and what you might be doing wrong.
Why aren’t you finding the one? Here’s what might be hampering your progress:
• You need to know what you are looking for in a partner. Saying that you want a good man/woman doesn’t define what type of person he/she should be.
• Make a list of realistic expectations of your soon-to-be partner. It makes no sense to meet a mere mortal and expect him to walk around the house like Captain America and then be Iron Man on the streets.
• Don’t act all crazy when you start dating someone who you think has the potential to be the one. Remember, dating is like holding an audition and you are also on centre stage, so don’t go running your mouth about your undying desire for marriage and children on the first date, telling this person about your wedding theme and the names of your future children, and don’t go inviting this person to family gatherings on the second date. These things will scare them off. No one is attracted to desperation.
• Never settle out of the need for being involved in a relationship. This will only lead to you feeling unfulfilled or being stuck in a relationship where you are unhappy. If the person isn’t the one then leave it alone. You can’t force sunshine in a cave; it’s a dark cave for a reason.
• Be true to who you are. Don’t lie about what you bring to the table. Don’t tell a man who loves a woman who can cook that you are great in the kitchen if the only thing you are good at is putting leftover Chinese food in the microwave. Just be honest.
• If you are running around being lonely and longing for love then you just might attract someone who is looking for someone like you – someone vulnerable to play with and use. Remember, it’s the energy that you put out there that you attract.
• Don’t walk around like a gamer who has mastered the skill levels of playing The Sims by making people be how you want them to be and controlling their every move in your perfect world. Because the reality is, you can’t mould a person into being your perfect partner. They either have what it takes to be your true love or they don’t.
• If you are looking for a partner to complete you and make your life happy, then spend some money on a good therapist. No one can make you happy but you. Finding a partner can only enhance your life, not make it go from zero to a hundred.
• Work on you before you go looking for love. We all have personal issues working on and it makes no sense to be in search of love when we are not truly ready to embrace it.
