Ways to improve relationship negotiation
IT’S not uncommon for couples to disagree on issues, but mastering the art of negotiation to move past these issues is what really matters.
Relationship counsellor Wayne Powell told All Woman that no two partners in a relationship will always agree, and so the couple must devise ways to effectively manage conflicts and disagreements.
Below he shares some ideas couples may consider in managing interpersonal conflict and improving communication.
1. Respect the person, even if you don’t favourably consider their opinion. “Attack the issues not the individual,” Powell recommended.
2. Avoid making unkind comments about your partner. Powell said this has the ability to cause them to shut down or withdraw.
3. Give your partner a chance to speak. The relationship counsellor said when deciding on a matter, it is important to allow your partner the opportunity to express him/herself without intimidation.
4. Carry your weight. Powell said when a decision is arrived at jointly, each partner must carry out his/her responsibility.
5. Control your temper. He advises to express your feelings in an assertive manner, not aggressively.
6. Know when to discuss issues. Powell said it is important to choose the right time and place to discuss an issue, and if you are wrong, don’t hesitate to say so and apologise if necessary.
Ways to improve negotiation include:
1. Adopting a win-win position.
2. Be reasonable with your demands.
3. Be prepared to strike a compromise if necessary.
4· Don’t use scare tactics to bully your partner to get what you want.
5· Allow your partner the opportunity to present and defend his/her point of view or position.
6· Be patient with your partner, who may not readily see your point of view.
7· Be respectful of the position taken by your partner, even if you don’t agree.
8· Don’t assume a “my way or no other way” stance.
