Why christian men steer clear of christian women
A popular concern among many young Christian women is the fact that more non-Christian men will pursue them than their brothers in Christ. And the reasons given for this often lead to controversial discussions.
Recently, Judi Mason, a US-based empowerment strategist, caused much furore when she penned the piece Christian men reveal their 12 reasons why they don’t date or marry Christian women on the blog BlackandMarriedWithKids.com.
Women especially bashed the views of the male respondents for saying, among other things, that Christian women thought of themselves and their virginity as prizes, were too sanctimonious, and too in love with Jesus to be of much use in relationships. But is this also true locally, with the high proliferation of churches and their huge moral influence on society? Are Christian men, including elders, going outside the church, and why?
Below All Woman asked some of these true believers to spill the beans.
Joshua:
Christian men want freakiness too; some Christian women are not so freaky, and some of the sexually pleasurable things that the men desire are taboo in the church.
Kevin:
Based on the article you reference, some of the points are valid — especially the prize one. So you’re a virgin, great! What happens after you get married, what do you have to offer then or bring to the table? And “too sanctimonious” is definitely a turn-off.
Lennox:
Christian women are too stuck-up, and there are certain things that a woman from outside will do that they won’t. I like my relationships to be open. And it’s not that I don’t like to go to church, but not every day like some Christian women will insist on doing. And then, the Christian woman will depend on pastor’s opinion for everything, because it’s pastor who tells her how to run her relationship.
Richard:
I know women who tell me that Jesus is the only man they want. How can I compete with that? I do want to marry a Christian woman, but I’ll choose one who experienced the world before getting baptized, rather than one who grew up in the church and knows no other man but Jesus.
Wayne:
A holier-than-thou woman can be a turn-off indeed. Sometimes you need a little naughtiness to add some spice. You see how some church sisters come real and talk up the things? Some sanctimonious women in the church are too filled with the Holy Ghost and Jesus. We desire a saint in the church, but she must be a “bad gyal” a yard.
Theo:
Most men love raw, physical and verbal affection, but these women don’t offer them this. Therefore, they will gravitate towards women who tend to do these things naturally.
Germaine:
You can’t generalise like that. It depends on the preference of the male. One of the main issues with Christian men and women is that most Christian men — and I’m talking from experience — will want to dabble in sex before tying the knot, and most Christian women put their feet down on that. The man will prefer to be a nice Christian guy with a worldly girl, so he can have one foot in the world and one foot in the church. In all honesty, most men would love a Christian woman, but they want one who — don’t get me wrong — has some “ghetto” in her. Jesus Christ is Lord and everything, but at the same time she should have this street smart thing about her.
Leon:
This is not my experience. Sure, I was attracted to many non-Christian women at university and many Christian women too. However, I know that if I were to marry a non-Christian woman I wouldn’t be at peace.
