Rekindling intimacy in marriage

THE Non Geographic Formations No. 2 Chaplaincy Service of the Jamaica Constabulary Force recently hosted a couples’ retreat as part of their Stress Management In Law Enforcement programme that was created two years ago to help policemen and women who have been suffering from chronic stress.

Part of the day’s activities featured a presentation from Dr Barry Davidson, CEO of Family Life Ministries, on rekindling the flame of intimacy and remaining faithful in marital relationships.Below All Woman shares tips from Dr Davidson for wives and husbands. 

WIVES:

1. Your behaviourDr Davidson said it is important to remember that actions speak louder than words. He said that marriages should never be plagued by nagging if you intend to keep the flames alive. “Don’t nag your husband. You may just push him into the arms of someone else,” he said. 

2. AppearanceHe said it is important not to go overboard when putting yourselves together; however, it doesn’t mean you should neglect yourself. “Remember, your husbands are out in the day seeing attractive women, so you can’t be home in worn-down slippers. Don’t overdo it, but also, don’t underdo it,” Dr Davidson said. 

3. Attitude“Have a gentle and quiet spirit. I’m not suggesting that you be weak, but be strong in self-control and dignity. Be a woman of quiet elegance.” 

4. Your responseDr Davidson advised wives to pay close attention to their husbands and attend to their needs, or someone else will do so. “If somebody else is doing so, it may be impossible to rekindle the flame,” he said. 

HUSBANDS: :

1. Live with your wife.“Be her close companion, do not be marginal in her life,” Dr Davidson said. 

2. Know your wifeDr Davidson said this includes knowing things about her that others don’t know, such as her fears, thoughts, secrets and needs. He said a wife’s needs include affection, conversation, understanding, openness and honesty. “They do not just want sex, they need to be made to feel valued, cared for, and not to be taken for granted.” 

3. Honour thy wifeDr Davidson said men should treat their wives with respect, love, encouragement, while taking care not to abuse her; pay her compliments, make her feel special, and be faithful to her. “The worst thing to do is dishonour your wife. Make sure you’re telling her she looks good. Make her feel special, valued, and make her know she’s your queen,” he stressed.