Dating the single mom
MANY single mothers, no matter how intelligent, successful and beautiful they may be, tend to feel below par on the dating market. The mere fact of their status as mothers can actually be a deal breaker for some men – even those with children of their own.
All Woman asked a few men whether they believe single mothers are high-value dating catches, or if they have too much baggage. Here is what they had to say:
Vaughn, bank teller, 35:
Single moms are sexy. What I also admire is that they are usually very responsible. They are independent and that is good, and they also understand the importance of supporting a partner.
Marlon, entrepreneur, 37:
If I believe that she is the right person for me, of course I would date her. I certainly wouldn’t have a problem accepting the mother and child. In fact, I would treat the child as my own. All I ask in return is that the child respects me.
Oddaine, marketing analyst 24:
I’d say no, honestly. I think our priorities would be different, and at this stage in my life we should be on the same level, thinking about the same things. I am not a parent as yet, and so I would rather my partner not be one either. Don’t get me wrong, as I can’t say I wouldn’t date a single mother, but it wouldn’t be my preferred choice to date a single mother at this stage in my life. Plus I just can’t take the baby daddy drama that I see unfolding in most cases.
Darnel, auto mechanic, 28:
Sometimes the only person that a single mother is capable of loving is her child. Some single women are so obsessed with being hurt by an ex or their child’s father that they can’t appreciate the love of another man, and they remain angry partners. No matter how selfless, full of compassion and patient they are with their kids, these feelings do not extend to you. For that reason, I just stay the hell away.
Stephen, paralegal, 27:
I would date a single mom. For one, I’d get to see what kind of a mother she is, and if our relationship were to move out of the dating stage into something more serious and lasting I would have a pretty good idea of the kind of mother my children would have if we were to share children. Secondly, if I can manage to form a great relationship with the kid and treat him or her as if they were my own child, it would create a strong bond of affection between me and the mother. But the opposite of that is also true — if the kid and I just can’t get along, it’s likely to cause all kinds of problems and things may not work out. But of course, I would want to try.
Romar, 36, chef:
I hate the thought of being caught up in some baby daddy drama, and this happens too often with single moms. So unless the father of the child is dead, I wouldn’t consider it.
Garth, plumber, 29:
Of course I would. Having a child more than anything brings out the best in a woman, I think. That’s a bonus. If I were a single father, I would want to be considered and have an equal footing on the dating market, because my child is not a disease. If you can’t accept a woman and her child, then the truth is that you’re not man enough for her and you’re not worthy of her.
Duwayne, teacher, 41:
Sometimes a single mother, because it’s always been her and the child, doesn’t know how to strike a balance between her man and her child’s needs. It’s almost like she always puts you dead last. Also, some of these women really don’t want you, they just want the financial security that comes with being with you, and their actions show this. I know these things because I have been played by a single mother before. I won’t say they’re all bad, but I will never again put myself in the situation to find out.