Best friends from high school Sean & Ruth-Ann Taylor share their love story
THIS week we continue our Happy Marriage Summer Series, in collaboration with Family and Faith Magazine, founded by editorial director Shelly-Ann Harris. Beautiful couple Sean and Ruth-Ann Taylor has been married for 13 years. The couple has four beautiful children — Caleb, 11; Eden, nine; Benjamin, eight; and Israel, five. Sean is presently the head of digital marketing at Barita Investments Ltd, and one of the pastors at Grace Family Church. Ruth-Ann, who has homeschooled the kids up to this point, is in the midst of a transition where she will be working as a breastfeeding specialist, helping new moms to successfully nurse their babies.
SH: How did you know that your partner was the one?
Ruth-Ann: Sean and I dated from high school on and off and we were best friends. I personally knew because God whispered to me one day that he was the one. I then carried him to all the people who loved me and who I trusted, and we went to several different counsellors together.
Sean: Ruthy was and still is my best friend. I would be sorry for any other woman that I would have married. They would be jealous of our closeness and I knew I would not want to lose our relationship. Simply put, she is a godly woman who I loved and wanted to marry.
SH: I had a chance to hear you introduce your husband who was the main speaker at Grace Family Church one Sunday. Your intro was sweet, vulnerable and honest. What’s the thing you value most about your husband, Ruth-Ann? And Sean, what do you value about Ruth-Ann?
Ruth-Ann: I guess it would be how humble and teachable he is.
Sean: Ruthy daily shows us what it means to live sacrificially. She is who I call my “end-times woman” because there is nothing she puts her mind to that she isn’t able to do. She chooses every day to live a life of service to God and her family.
SH: What’s one of the most challenging issues you have faced as a married couple and how did you overcome it?
Ruth-Ann: Getting married so young meant there was lots we had to learn so I would say the hardest part of the learning was doing so while being very sick during pregnancy and raising several babies at once with adequate but not much money while still loving God, my husband and maintaining a church community.
Sean: They tell you to study hard, get good jobs and make enough money so you can start a family. We have chosen to walk a path that isn’t the norm. That has meant we have often been in a season of life that looks different from most people our age. That looked like choosing things like living in a one-bedroom apartment, with three children, while Ruthy stayed home during the formative years. Or deciding that we would move our family overseas while I studied to be a pastor with our entire family, not knowing exactly how we would do that financially. Such things add pressure to any marriage, but being willing to learn from others and being engaged in Christian community have been important means of God’s grace to keep us strong.
SH: Has parenting challenged or strengthened your marriage?
Sean & Ruth-Ann: Parenting has humbled us immensely and has definitely caused us to rely on Jesus more and more. It has cause us to see aspects of ourselves that has had us repenting on a regular basis. We have always seen our kids as the blessings that they are and the ways we have been able to grow in our character and our skill sets in raising them have been amazing. Godly counsel has really served us in these years of parenting, warning us to prioritise our marriage while we parent. So we have sought to continue building our marriage. Weekly we have date nights (in house or out of house) and that’s prioritised by us and respected by our children, church meetings and work schedules. We also try to get away often; at least once a year together. We try to prioritise growing in affection in the midst of the chaos so that we grow while they grow.
SH: What are some of the biggest lessons you have learnt about marriage and family over the years?
Sean & Ruth-Ann: Trust God and His word and live according to the things His word says. For example, “do not forsake the fellowship of believers” — we have not always felt like it; sometimes fights get in our way but we continue to prioritise what God’s word says and it has served us tremendously. “A soft answer turns away wrath” when applied is powerful and true. “Love bears all things, hopes all things…” when applied God is at work. We depend on God being at work in us to live out these truths daily and in every moment.
We read marriage and parenting books yearly to help to revive our marriage and strengthen our parenting.
We are part of a local church and we have submitted to its leaders. This helps with accountability for both of us and our kids. Staying in community has definitely served us tremendously.
We did choose as a family to homeschool for the early years of our children’s lives and that has served our family tremendously — both financially and also in being able to bring stability in the early years.
