Women will love her,

That she is a woman

More worth than any man;

Men, that she is

The rarest of all women.

– Shakespeare, The Winter’s Tale V,1

WOMEN will love her, indeed, more than they will ever love any man, for she has more worth than any man, at least to them. Based on that quote above, is long time dem tings going on — women loving other women and having nothing to do with men.

But is she really the rarest of all women, or is she but one of the millions of women who just prefer to be in the company of other women? This seems to have not only seeped into our society, but has mushroomed into a way of life that has made its way even into our high schools. Should we blame it on cable TV?

Oh, yes, girls loving girls in high schools is no secret anymore, and it’s reported that they even have gangs that not only try to initiate prospective members, but also stalk unwilling, unwitting, unsuspecting victims.

That we all know about, but what happens when a man loses his woman to another woman? We’ll find out right after these responses to ‘Proof of the pudding’.

Hi Tony,

Entering a relationship for both partners is similar to buying a new car. You have to be satisfied with the shape and beauty of the automobile, checking out the ‘chassis’, the size and shape of the headlamps, feeling and caressing the ‘upholstery’, be satisfied with the type of ‘gear stick’, and making sure that you can shift gears smoothly.

One needs to know that the car can go distances, often without running out of gas, and of course, you have to perform a test drive before committing to the car, preferably several times.

Chelsea

Mr Teerob,

Man, I couldn’t agree with you more, although those holier than thou church people might not take your words too kindly. The truth is, it is foolish to commit to anything sight unseen, and this applies to people too. So many men marry virgins and end up regretting it, as sex is not her priority at all. Also, women end up marrying men who have no clue about lovemaking and live a life of sexual frustration. So many marriages suffer because of sexual incompatibility.

Norman

I was more than a bit amused to see this man’s letter to the advice column a few weeks ago. In it, he bemoaned the fact that his wife had lost sexual interest in him and instead preferred to hang out with her girlfriends.

“Could she be having an affair with another man and using her friends as cover?” he asked. When I showed my wife the letter she quickly summed it up, “That ‘other man’ he’s worried about is a woman.” And so it very well could be.

I do know of men who have lost their women to other women, and they say that apart from the emotional hurt, the embarrassment is even greater. “Imagine, here I am thinking that she have man, when is woman she have.”

Male friends can be merciless. “Whapp’n, Trevor, your woman leff you for another woman… is suh yu soff, bredrin?…. Hahaha!”

Now, it is said that it’s every man’s pet fantasy to end up in bed with two beautiful women at the same time. There are men who can’t get this, so they do the next best thing and have a woman on the side instead. Some men do manage to fulfil this fantasy by taking in another woman to share their bed along with the wife.

Oh, yes, some wives are up to it. It’s the new-age, modern-day, liberated sexual experience that some wives are not averse to. In fact, there are wives who actually initiate it to spice up the marriage, and say, “Honey, how about you, me, and Monica having a thing?”

Most men’s eyeballs would pop out of their heads and their loins strain in anticipation at the suggestion, especially if the other woman is gorgeous. But be careful what you wish for, as you will certainly get it, then you can’t deal with it.

In many instances the two women may be so drawn to each other that the man is left out of the picture and left holding his…. his…. well, holding his pestle with no mortar to put it in. Now, you’re going to ask me what a mortar and pestle are. Country folks will know.

In some cases, the wife may even end up leaving the man for her female lover as the pleasures far supersede what he could ever give her. Plus, maybe she suggested the threesome just to get her lover in the picture on a regular basis.

Men have been known to suspect their women of cheating because of their change of habits. She started to act suspiciously, whispering in the phone, always out socialising without him, withholding sex from him, leading him to think, “She having an affair with another man, but I can’t detect any male presence at all, not even pon her phone.” That’s because the other man is a woman, dude, so you’ll never know.

She’s always on the phone with Marsha. She prefers to go to the movies with Marsha. She always invites Marsha over for dinner. She can’t let a day pass without talking to Marsha. Bredrin, wise up, Marsha is her man.

Why is this so? The experts say that many women naturally prefer the company of other women. If you think about it, more women flock together for girls’ night out than men bond. This male bonding myth is grossly exaggerated, except during sports, as women tend to have more of a herd mentality than men.

It seems so natural. They laugh, chat, gossip, share secrets, preen each other, exchange glamour tips. All this attention often grows into something bigger, and suddenly it turns to passion.

Men can’t compete with this and, truthfully, some men already lack the sensitivity to connect with their woman, so the path is even made easier for her to bond with her female friend. It’s even stronger when the man is the object of her complaints and she seeks refuge in her female friend.

So, as usual, water seeks its own level, and the woman finds solace in her girlfriend, shuts the man out, and bonds with her sistren. This can have a devastating effect on some men, as their egos are shattered, often beyond repair.

I know of men who still haven’t recovered from this experience, even after 10 years. “Imagine, she leff me for another woman. Better if it was another man.” There is a stigma, a shame, that such a man will never shake off, and he will always be remembered as the man who lost his woman to another woman.

Ironically, there are a handful of men who do not regard this as seriously as they would another man being with their woman. “Man, that is nothing, after all, nutten serious cyaan go on physically between them.”

That’s the fear of many men, that another man would put his pestle in his mortar, and worse, if that man happens to have a bigger pestle.

The theory is, another man can defile his woman, but another woman has nothing to defile her with. Still, it hurts the majority of men to know that their woman finds more pleasure with other women than with him.

There used to be a time when affairs had a familiar ring to them: Man’s wife has male lover, or woman’s husband has female lover. Now the permutations and variables take on algebraic proportions. “If M+W=F then what is F-M+W? ” Shake them all up in a basket and see who comes up with whom.

“Errr, wife leaves husband for other woman, but husband has male lover on the side, while male lover also checking wife of husband.” It’s all so confusing.

Now, to really flip the scenario, what happens when the husband’s ‘other woman’ is a man? But that’s for another day.

More time.

seido1@hotmail.com

Footnote: Rumours were swirling about the demise of our postal service, as it’s outdated and outlived its usefulness. I really have to wonder, as I have suffered so much from this ageing institution. So often when mail is sent to me from overseas it takes forever to reach here, or doesn’t arrive at all.

On numerous occasions I do not receive my

monthly National Geographic magazines and have to contact that organisation in the USA for replacements. Foreign people have sent me important documents that arrive long after the due date, if they arrive at all. Yet they arrive in other countries when mailed from the same source. What is really wrong with our postal service? Snail mail is one thing, but no mail is another.

On another note, people, especially ladies, when buying petrol, make sure you look at the pump to see that you get what you pay for. Many have been shortchanged.