The expense of spirit in a waste of shame,

Is lust in action, and till action lust

Is perjured, murderous, bloody, full of blame,

Enjoyed no sooner but displayed straight;

Mad in pursuit, and in possession so;

A bliss in proof, and in quest to have, overcome;

All this the world well knows, yet now knows well

To shun the heaven that leads men to their hell.

— Shakespeare, Sonnet 129

Actually that above quote is really not complete, but excerpts from the sonnet that I thought would accurately describe what men experience in their pursuit of women.

This chase, thrust and parry, cut and feint, running down, having to possess, using all methods fair or foul, just to get into women’s pants has been the game of man since Adam convinced Eve to give it up. Or was she the one with the lustful intent, the seducer? Was that the heaven that leads men to their hell?

He came, he saw, he conquered. That is the modus operandi of man who came out of woman and spends his every waking day and night, trying to get back in. He spends money too, let’s not forget that.

And just like the Pied Piper he sees the wide variety of women — tall ones, short ones, slim ones, fat ones, brown ones, black ones, white ones, tawny ones and even bleached ones — that he has to possess.

So many women, so little time; that’s our pursuit today, right after these not-so-woeful responses to my take on ‘Women’s woes’.

Hi Tony,

The thought that Hillary Clinton may have lost the election because she is a woman got me thinking about world leaders who are or were women. I am sure many, if not all, had to struggle to overcome obstacles, battles and break the glass ceiling to rise. I also believe that women are built to deal with pain and the burdens of life better than men. We men should place all women on a pedestal and praise them for all that they do for mankind.

Cedric

Teerob,

I bet your wife coerced you to write that article. I do agree that some women do have a hard time coping, but so do many men. In fact, men have a more difficult road to travel as so much is expected of them, and they dare not fall short. A woman fails and she gets sympathy, but a man’s failure is met with scorn and ridicule. No wonder this stress leads to so much absentee fathers or even suicide. Expectations are so high of men who can’t even cry as it’s considered weak. Men have their woes too.

Ronald

Hugh Hefner of Playboy fame died a few weeks ago and with him a very special era. For those of you who may not know, Hugh Hefner was perhaps the singular most important architect of the sexual revolution in not only the USA but indeed many other countries of the world.

He was the founder of the Playboy empire, which included the iconic Playboy magazine, with its semi-nude and nude women, aptly named Playboy Bunnies, with the highlight of each month being the centrefold and the piece de resistance, the annual Playmate of the year. He also had nightclubs all over the world, and I had the good fortune to visit one in London. It was quite an experience.

In fact a Playboy Club was located here in Jamaica in Boscobel many years ago. Hefner put a spin on sex and opened doors that were once thought taboo. But it was the Playboy magazine that was the flagship of the Playboy dynasty.

Oh how we loved those monthly magazines and would cherish them like the Holy Grail, saving old issues for many years. We looked forward to them not only for the maddening, sensuous naked women, but also for the great articles that graced their pages. Yes, Playboy had fantastic articles written by brilliant writers that we all learned from.

Politics, nature, human behaviour, space exploration, science, were all explored in those glossy pages. My late father, in his wisdom, would ‘inadvertently’ leave those magazines laying around the house, saving him from giving us boys any talks about the birds and the bees and also exposing us to the beautiful female form… and, of course, the educational articles.

Playboy was extremely educational and shaped the sexual lives of millions of teenage boys worldwide and thousands of young boys here in Jamaica. You can count me in that lot and I am not alone in that passion.

Here’s what media icon Tony Morrison had to say about his introduction to Playboy. “I was probably drawn to the pictures at first like everybody else, but that was when I was a very small kid sneaking a look at my father’s not-so-well-hidden old editions, having discovered, by reading my first James Bond novel, that people had sex for fun and not just for reproduction. Fascinating as that was then, by the time I was 10 I was finding the literary content equally if not more fascinating, and I continue being a fan of Playboy for the articles, with the pretty girls a welcome fringe benefit.”

Hugh Hefner, who many men envied for his lifestyle, said that he slept with over a thousand women, which if you scope it out and do the math, wasn’t all that many, considering that he lived to be over 90 years old and had easy access to thousands of gorgeous women at his finger tips… or at his tip at least.

People like basketball legend Wilt Chamberlain claimed to have bedded over 20,000 women, yes, twenty thousand, and there are many other men who have racked up thousands of conquests.

So many women, so little time. It is the ambition and dream of most men to sleep with as many women as they can. Anyone who says otherwise is lying, delusional, being hypocritical or gay. Boys are encouraged to sow their wild oats, and this has been going on since the dawn of time.

Kings, emperors, sultans, potentates, had their harems stocked with women. Even now some countries still embrace polygamy as long as the man can take care of the many wives. In Western cultures that is frowned upon, but men still practise it anyway, albeit in a different form, undercover, surreptitiously, having a mistress or two on the side. The mistress, matey, concubine, other woman, all products of this practice.

Heck, some of our deejays, athletes, musicians, sports stars, each have dozens of children with countless women. Let’s not forget politicians, clergymen, and others who indulge in pleasures of the flesh with multiple women. So many women, so much hypocrisy, so little integrity.

So many women, so little time. But as we like to say here, “You cyan’t dun it, boss, yu cyan’t dun it, tek time.” Of course, after a time many men settle down, take unto themselves a wife and live a life of monogamous respectability. But the cherished memories of the past still keep them smiling. “I can live off my memories now, but man, I can’t even remember some of their names.”

Listen, you know it’s true, and we lucky ones all bask in the memories of yesteryear. Be honest now, would you want your son to grow up without having any experience, just meeting one woman, marrying her and living happily ever after? I think not.

Is so the system set. I grew up on Playboy magazine and I was fortunate with women. I was a tall, athletic, sports-loving youngster, well over six feet tall and 200 pounds who went to Kingston College, which is a female magnet, so I too have my stories. But real men don’t tell. I wish my son the same good fortune.

The fact is, young healthy men love women, and my parents saw me as a normal, balanced, red-blooded Jamaican boy. The hypocrites among us who frown are just that, hypocrites or envious that they couldn’t partake in the game.

King David, Solomon, Samson from Bible days had their share of women, counting in the thousands, and they were great men. Casanova, Don Juan, Henry Miller, Lothario, Hugh Hefner were heroes for us all. It’s natural, but you just have to be responsible and careful.

You play the field, sow your wild oats, until you find the right one to settle down with. So many women, but take time with their feelings.

More time.

seido1@hotmail.com

Footnote: There is this brouhaha going on about that woman who beat her 12-year-old daughter with a machete. I was shocked when I saw it, but I also felt sympathy for the mother who must have been at her wits’ end regarding her daughter’s behaviour. Skilled as she was, she shouldn’t have used a machete though as grave bodily harm could have been inflicted. But mothers administer punishment all the time with straps, belts, tamarind switches and rulers. It’s our culture, at least it used to be. My mother used a belt and she loved me dearly, and my love for her never diminished. Don’t crucify that poor mother. She needs help. Have you seen the explicitly sexual videos that teenagers are posting? Teenagers can be maddening and only professionals can deal with some of them.