If you have been reading my articles then you would know I love to travel. But the opportunity to travel and hear Michelle Obama speak was one opportunity I could not miss! So when a good friend called me one Sunday morning and asked what I was doing February 8, and invited me to Oprah Winfrey’s Vision 2020 tour, which featured the former first Lady as the keynote speaker, my response was an enthusiastic “Yes!”

 So here I am sharing highlights and titbits that have stuck with me. The whole day featured activities and conversational presentations geared at audience members owning and accepting a clear purpose for their lives. It really is a Weight Watchers rebranding to wellness tour, but I have zero regrets, thanks to Rachel Hollis and Michelle Obama.

 Girl, Stop Apologising author Rachel Hollis. What an unexpected treat! It was the first time I heard her speak. Her confidence and ability to be unapologetically herself was inspiring. There was no topic too taboo for her to speak about. Now, if you know anything about this woman you know she has massive personality. She solidified certain truths for me, like “you can’t pour from an empty tank”. But my big takeaway from Hollis was that I have to purposely make time for my goals. It’s that vision, focus and action needed to ensure that all the other “must dos” don’t crowd out that which drives me and feeds my soul.

 She also touched on how we allow certain things or people to deter us; not everyone deserves to have an opinion about your life or how you choose to evolve. This is true, especially if they have never done what you are doing. Why do we allow the opinions of others to occupy so much of our emotions?

Another reminder was that comparison is the stealer of joy. We compare our lives to the Instagram highlights of others. We surely didn’t see how many pics were taken before the perfectly curated and filtered image was posted.

She also spoke about the fear of failure. I know when I was younger I struggled with this. Failure was just not an option for me. But, if you have never failed it means you have not pushed hard enough. It is what you learn from the failure and what you do next that counts. You cannot let fear cripple you.

 But without further delay, let’s talk about the main event! Dr Michelle Obama! She exemplifies a woman who has been through it and has still chosen to rise above the fray with class. Below are a few of my takeaways:

1. Do not apologise or feel badly about changing. You should change. It’s growth. Women evolve.

2. Give back to yourself. As women we tend to pour into our jobs and families and almost feel guilty for wanting time for ourselves. But, as the saying goes, you can’t pour from an empty vessel.

3. People will always have something to say, so when they go low think about whether it’s worth a response. What will the response achieve and who will be uplifted?

4. To have a platform is a gift; use it wisely and unselfishly.

5. Accept and embrace the age and stage you are at.

6. Walk your own walk. You cannot define yourself by looking at others.

7. Be kind to yourself. We have so much self-doubt and judgement towards ourselves and we really need to just stop. Both Oprah and Michelle Obama noted how this evolves as you age and the doubt wanes as you come into the knowledge of self.

It would be remiss of me not to speak about how vulnerable Oprah allowed herself to be at the end of the day when she spoke of her mother. They had a difficult relationship, to put it kindly. But if one is truly to find one’s happiness, however it is defined, it must come with the release that only forgiveness can offer. So I shall leave you with this: take back your power and emotional headspace. Forgive whoever you need to forgive. Make a commitment to bettering yourself.