BREAKING up with someone over WhatsApp, text, DM or word of mouth list among the worst ways to do the deed. But that’s the how. The why is even worse, especially when the reason is so ridiculous that you’re left wondering if it’s a prank.

We asked, what’s the most messed up reason someone gave for breaking up with you?

Marlon, 32:

I was with this girl for two years and things were going well. She had met my family and I met hers, and we were basically living together. Everything was good, and I saw her as my wife. She never gave any indication that anything was wrong. I thought the next step would be marriage and children, but one day she was in the kitchen and I mentioned that she would be a great mother to our kids. She stopped what she was doing, then blurted out, “No, we will not be having any kids.” I thought something was medically wrong, but later on she confessed that she didn’t want any children who may potentially look like me. So I was good enough to be her boyfriend, but my head was too big to be her children’s dad. That hurt a lot, especially when she said that she didn’t mean to offend me, but if I didn’t get over it, she would have to leave me. She broke up with me, probably a week after, because she claimed that I didn’t like honesty, and she had to tell it like she saw it.

Renae, 30:

He said my three year old was too rude and was mashing up his house and wouldn’t listen when he tried to discipline him, and he just couldn’t deal with that. He expected the baby to sit like a statue at all times and never play.

Kadian, 34:

My aunt who raised me got sick, and I had to be going to her house daily to help her out as she had no one else close by. He said I was spending too much time there, and she wasn’t even my mother and seemed strong enough, so he didn’t know why I was allowing her to take away his time. He said life was too short for that kind of stress, and there were other fish in the sea.

Martin, 40:

She said she had a dream in which she saw my mother planning her funeral, and she always knew my mother was evil, and so she was moving on before my family corrupted her spirit. Even when I tried to tell her that funeral dreams meant something positive, homegirl was not having it. She was out of my life within days of her dream.

Evan, 43:

We were at the stage where we were meeting each other’s parents. By this time we had dated all through university and two years into the working world. She took me to the country to meet her folks and they welcomed me with open arms and gave me lots of produce to take back to Kingston. So you can imagine my surprise when she said that we had to separate because her parents didn’t like me. I still don’t know what the true story was — maybe I was too black or too poor, but she eventually ended up marrying someone from her hometown who went to her folks’ church.