KINGSTON, Jamaica – When Jamila Pinto learnt that she was going to have a baby and eventually become a single parent, almost three years ago, she knew she had to do something for herself and other women to grow and heal through such a vulnerable time.

The 29-year-old mother of a beautiful 21-month-old daughter said she was in the process of writing a book based on the challenges and healing process of pregnancy and motherhood when she got the idea to create For the Woman 365 Healing Journal.

“I guess the Holy Spirit put the idea into my mind first to do this journal before the official release of that book. It was supposed to be a single mothers’ journal but then I just made it more general for women,” Pinto told Observer Online.

According to Pinto, the book is a prompt journal designed to help women grow through healing, self-discovery and vulnerability to reach that stage of peace, fulfilment and abundance.

“It takes you on a year-long journey – asking you questions and recommending activities about themes like awareness, forgiveness, purpose, love, peace and more so you can reach that stage of peace and purpose. It’s almost like your personal therapist,” Pinto said.

She added that, “We go through a lot and sometimes we don’t get the time or chance or even know how to really pour into ourselves and that’s why I started this journal. It’s to bring us back to our higher selves and fill our own cups so that we may bless others. Empower the woman, you empower the nation. There’s a free version available as well on forthewomanjournal.com.”

Therefore, as a single parent, Pinto advised mothers who will be doing it alone, that it will get better.

“Single moms are never really alone because you have God and there is a whole community to help once you carefully identify it. Give yourself grace and love. Invest in your health and be courageous, if you need to rearrange your life for the betterment of you and your child, identify your priorities, trust yourself, make the decision and do it. Also, accepting that this is not an easy road will help with building mental fortitude,” she said.

Recalling how she felt when she found out she was pregnant, Pinto said at that time she didn’t see herself becoming a mother anytime soon. As such, she battled with the decision to actually have her child.

“When I finally made the decision to have my child and become a mom – I knew that I would be committed and do what I needed to do to be the best mom for my daughter. I was very anxious. I went through depression in my first trimester (and postpartum) because I felt like my entire world was crumbling because of this life-changing decision. My entire life pretty much did a 180 turn. Everything changed,” she told Observer Online.

Nevertheless, for her, being a single parent means being the decision-maker and primary caretaker.

“I have to take extra care of my well-being so that my daughter can have a healthy mother who takes care of her. Just more resilience, patience and being more emotionally mature and intelligent in an effort to communicate and understand my daughter better. And in a way (sadly) it means I can’t have the expectation of anyone to give my daughter the primary care and love that she needs to grow healthily – she is my priority,” Pinto explained, adding that she was fortunate enough to have a great support system.

“My experience of being in single motherhood can be polarising. Being a single mom means not being in a relationship really, but there is still a community I can call on to help with taking care of my daughter. The best experiences come from just being in her presence everyday and being around for all her major milestones. When she’s learning to walk, to talk, when she’s discovering new things and all of that. We have a great relationship and I’m thankful for that. We have our challenges but we grow through them,” she continued.

Pinto went on to say that while it is very rewarding being a parent, the most difficult part is finding time for herself. Once considered a “gym rat” who kept up with her beauty routines, Pinto stated that she doesn’t really get the time to do that anymore.

“I’m also a bit of a recluse and I don’t get time to disappear anymore. And of course, as a single mom you feel heartbroken about a failed relationship and the nuclear family dream, so there’s those as well to go through. Because of being in this position though, I’m able to rekindle my relationship with God. I don’t [know] where I’d be today without the Spirit. It takes strength to surrender to your Creator and have faith, knowing and praying that it is well,” Pinto said.