“IT is wise not to seek a secret, and honest not to reveal one”. So says English writer William Penn in Some Fruits of Solitude, highlighting the importance of keeping your secrets secret, and your private life private, something not many people are able to do in this culture of oversharing.

Fact is, according to the women below, some secrets, especially in relationships, are meant to be kept thus, and these they say are some of the biggies that they’ll continue to keep from their significant others, to keep the peace.

April, 27:

Two summers ago I got pregnant, but because I hadn’t been dating my man that long, I decided to terminate. I Googled a bunch of stuff and took a bunch of potions, and I don’t know which one of them worked, but I eventually got my cycle, thank God. He doesn’t know that all that parsley and vitamin C that was in the cupboard and fridge wasn’t for cooking, or because I wanted to fight the flu.

Sharon, 50:

My son is 25 and a blind man could tell that he’s not my husband’s, but he doesn’t suspect a thing. Neither of us have ever discussed it, but I do know his actual father. I could say that I’ll go to the grave with this secret, but my son is overseas and is filing for us, and if at any point a DNA test is needed, I’m in deep doo-doo. I’m praying that testing doesn’t become a requirement in our case.

Amelia, 34:

I hate the fact that I got married to my husband and had his child because of how messed up his family is. I believe in generational curses and didn’t find out until after we got married how filthy his family background is. Also, I can see where the absence of a father in his life made my husband a lousy partner and father, and how his single mother raised him to be deficient in so many things. I’m so turned off, but I can’t let him know.

Latoya, 44:

I got my tubes tied after I had a stillbirth 12 years ago, and didn’t tell him. After that traumatic pregnancy, I never wanted to be in that position again. I hated being pregnant and wasn’t even sure I wanted to parent. We ‘tried’ to get pregnant for a long time after that, but I didn’t tell him that it was all in vain, not because of any medical reason, but because I tied off.

Suelle, 25:

When I was in sixth form his uncle and I had a thing because I needed money to pay my school fees. His uncle, my ex sugar daddy, has dementia and doesn’t remember, thank God, but I remember him quite well. It’s something I’d never share though, because I see my man as my future husband.