KINGSTON, Jamaica— Men must reclaim the role of head of the household and be better fathers if the society is to improve, according to Talk Therapy Founder and Director Lexis Haynes.

“I’m not going to say statistics because we have not run the numbers on it [but] I’ve been through the parishes. I’ve heard the cry of the father, I’ve heard the cry of the mother. What I’m realising, there’s not a lot of fathers in the homes. So a lot of [young people] look for fathers. That’s why we have dons,” Haynes said.

She explained that combating this is the purpose of her societal group.

“Talk Therapy is here to encourage and to uplift and to talk to fathers in the 14 parishes about how powerful it is to have a man in your household,” she said during a visit to several inner city communities on Saturday including Rema, sections of east Kingston, Waltham Park and Chisholm Avenue.

“Based on what we’re seeing in Jamaica with the crime and the violence and the fatherless and the motherless and stuff like that, what [the men] are saying is that having a father in the household means a lot,” she said.

Haynes bemoaned what she described as the breakdown of the nuclear family which in some cases created single mothers and, in others, single fathers.

“Now the man is being a mother. The [maternal] instinct in them has to be activated when that’s not what they were really born for. They’re doing it silently. They’re doing it quietly, but they’re doing it well,” the founder said.

One single father who had raised his son alone for a period of time while the child’s mother was away shared his experience.

“It was a good experience for me because I got a feel of what the mother would have to do in terms of parenting. Doing the female part of the parenting, it was very tough. But I mean it is something that I relished and I enjoyed, the cooking, the washing, you name it,” the man said.

The father, who had grown up in a single parent home himself, said the “village” style of parenting was dying out, to the detriment of young people.

“Most of the parents now are single parents. A lot of them don’t want anybody at all to talk to their kids, whether good or bad. None at all,” he said.

He added that being present was paramount.

“Being around a child makes a whole lot of difference. You can see what they are doing on a daily basis, You can check up on schoolwork, counselling him, talking to him every day about life and what you have been through and how you want it better for him,” he said.

For the fathers who had left the home, Haynes said: “It’s not about sending things for your children, what about just a one-on-one? They would love to see their fathers at a sports event. Go and visit the mothers.”