That STD talk
Health experts will tell you to be open and honest with your partner about medical issues, especially in the case of sexually transmitted diseases or infections that will impact the other party. In fact, in some cases it is not only immoral but illegal to withhold this kind of information from your partner.
But how do you have that talk? Talking about STDs isn’t easy to begin with, worse, talking about it when it happens while you are supposed to be committed to your partner. Below, readers tell how they would handle and share the news of a positive test.
Devon M, 38:
Leave. If you are going to date someone and it gets to the level where you start to have unprotected sex, if you are a responsible person you would want to get blood and other tests before doing so. So it would mean that the person cheated on you, and not only that, but is clearly leaving you exposed by not protecting themselves when they are doing so.
Wallace P, 37:
I would cuss and go on bad.
Ann J, 34:
Some things I can handle, but not that one! That would be the end of that relationship. Seriously. Because if you can put my life at risk like that, then you mean me no good.
Stacey B, 29:
Honestly, I don’t know. Maybe I would cuss and go on bad, maybe I would talk about it in a calm way and consider whether or not I should leave him, because it could have been something else. Or maybe I would forgive him and make sure he always uses protection with me. I’m just not sure.
William W, 41:
I would wonder if it’s her or someone else who gave it to me! So I wouldn’t say anything, just in case it’s not her.
Bobby R, 43:
It’s hard, very hard! The whole trust would just break down. We would definitely break up with bitterness.
Rose S, 39:
Bawl, scream, hit him. Then calm down and seek treatment. Then leave.
Seymour M, 34:
It would be more about the deception than the STI itself. They are cheating on you and also being reckless with it. There are no two ways about it — relationship over!
Tony C, 43:
I would ask a lot of questions, like why did she step outside for sex? Is there something missing in our relationship? Why didn’t you protect yourself if you are going to cheat? Communication plays a part of that. At the end of the day it would hurt, but if you as individuals love each other enough, then you can try and put it behind you and work on the relationship to make sure something like that does not happen again. It would be devastating at first, but it’s something that you could work through together.
Morris S, 28:
I would have to get treated and deal with it, then cut her off!
Jason S, 38:
That’s a tough one. I suspect we would break up.
Nordia W, 29:
That would definitely be an indication that he is cheating, and that knowledge would be devastating. I would withhold sex for three months and when I resume I would always use a condom.
Benjamin C, 38:
I would tell the person to go get tested. I would explain to them that they have something and that they should deal with it. Then I would decide whether to stay or go. If you said you were a virgin and then this, or that I was the only one, well, there would be some serious trust issues.