How my first relationship changed me

YOUR first relationship might have been daunting as it was unfamiliar territory and chances are you were left to figure it out on your own. But despite the rough patches in the initial stages, and learning to work through them, there are lessons that the relationship might have taught you that either changed you for better or worse.

Below individuals tell All Woman how their first relationship changed them.

Rascine H:

After my first relationship I stopped spoiling men. I had my first relationship at age 19 and I did everything he asked me to do. I would invite him over on weekends and cook for him and he had locks, so I would wash and oil his scalp. But he would never go the extra mile for me. So since that I’ve decided to not spoil men, but let them carry their own weight and care for themselves.

Yanike W:

My first relationship made me develop self -worth. My then boyfriend left me for another woman and I had to find my own strength to get over it. The relationship lasted for seven years and within that time I lost a sense of who I was and honestly believed I couldn’t survive without him. When I started believing in myself, I was able to date more and enjoy my own company.

Romaine R:

I stopped taking women at face value. I was so gullible in that I’d believe anything a woman told me without questioning it. Well, she was a Christian girl, Miss Goody Two Shoes, but she still managed to break my heart, as she demanded respect for her body from me, but became pregnant for another man who was not a Christian.

Leroy W:

My first relationship broke me out of my shyness. I learnt to be more open and straightforward with my thoughts, to say what’s on my mind, ask for what I want and not expect her to read my mind.

Charmaine L:

It changed me a whole lot. I was used to being proud and feeling as if the world revolved around me, but that relationship taught me the importance of humility, because when he broke my spirit and heart, I had no one to confide in or talk to as I was too proud walking over them, thinking I had it all together.

Alicia M:

It changed me in that I became bitter. Now I can’t be in a relationship and not be the antagonist. The change came after I found out he cheated on me and gave me an STI. Though I got rid of it through treatment, I was so distraught that I started cursing, picking arguments and became a fully fledged shrew.

Michael Y:

I became a better man. I’m a sucker for tears and after my first relationship I witnessed my then girlfriend cry her heart out, not because I broke up with her, but because of how I did it. So I’ve learnt to employ a bit if tact in whatever I do.

Richard M:

I stopped telling lies because when they catch up to you it’s not a good thing and you end up being embarrassed. I used to lie to my first girlfriend a lot to impress her, but she knew I didn’t live in the hills nor was I rich as I so nicely fabricated. Truth is she liked me for who I am, not what I had. Since then I have learnt to be proud of who I am and where I’m from and work towards having a better life.