6 reasons to run from a narcissistic relationship
Have you ever been in a relationship with someone who seemed intent on just taking from you and not giving anything back? Someone whose treatment of you eventually made you feel like you were losing your sense of self and the life was being sucked out of you? Perhaps the person even went as far as to convince you that you were the problem in the relationship, but try as you might, you couldn’t put your finger on what you’d done wrong.
Narcissistic personality disorder is a mental disorder in which the person has an overwhelming sense of their own importance, and a need for constant admiration. Here are six reasons you should run if you find yourself in a relationship with a narcissistic person
1. Your partner will rarely, if ever, accept responsibility
A narcissistic person has a sense of self-importance, so they rarely, if ever, accept responsibility for anything that doesn’t make them look or feel good about themselves. That is why they do not offer explanations for anything they may do that doesn’t sit well with you.
2. Don’t expect apologies
In the same way that they do not see themselves as responsible for anything that is wrong in the relationship, they rarely, if ever, offer apologies when caught red-handed. They prefer to either be defensive or ambiguous in their response. The sooner you realise they will not apologise and stop waiting for an apology, the better it is for you.
3. You might get ‘ghosted’
Narcissistic people do not believe they owe anyone an explanation for their behaviour, so ‘ghosting’, or the phenomenon of disappearing from a relationship with no contact or explanation to the other partner, is something they can do with no sense of regret. ‘Ghosting’ can be a very painful experience, as the person who is ghosted is often left without answers, and tries desperately to figure out what they did wrong. If you see signs that someone you are dating is narcissistic, don’t be surprised if you get ‘ghosted’.
4. The fish on a hook
A narcissistic partner is good at reeling you in like a fish and throwing you back into the water as they see fit. You might get frustrated after being treated badly and consider walking away. However, as soon as you decide to walk away, they will be nice and sweet and reel you right back in, but it’s only a matter of time before you are back in the water struggling to stay afloat.
5. Emotional manipulation
One of the most dangerous traits of a narcissistic person is their ability to emotionally manipulate others. The most intelligent man or woman can be manipulated by a narcissist as long as they are capable of empathy. They play on your emotions and are very good at making you feel that whatever may have happened is actually YOUR fault, not theirs. For instance, a narcissistic man who is caught cheating can manipulate his partner into thinking she was failing in some aspect of their relationship and that’s why he went outside. If you are not careful, you can begin to see yourself as the culprit when nothing could be further from the truth.
6. They criticise but cannot take criticism
Beneath all the pomp and fluff of a narcissist lies a fragile person who suffers from low self-esteem and deep insecurities. That is why they need to put their partners down in order to feed their own sense of importance. Your tears and pain mean nothing to them. In fact they thrive on inflicting emotional hurt without any indication of remorse. What is most interesting is that they will criticise continuously but they cannot handle criticism. For your own mental and emotional well-being, love yourself enough to avoid these types of people or walk away from this kind of toxic relationship before it destroys you.
Marie Berbick aka ‘The PR Girl’, is a communications specialist, motivational speaker and founder of the women’s ministry Sisters United for Prayer, Healing, Empowerment & Restoration (SUPHER). Follow her on Twitter @thePRGirl or e-mail marieberbick@gmail.com.
