New year, new you…in bed
IT’S 2016 and many people are now compiling lists of things they wish to attain, change or tweak in their lives. This list should include making your sex life more fulfilling, especially if things have been a little humdrum in the bedroom during the last year.
Denecia Green, author of Lies Sex & Betrayal, shares a few tips for improving your sexual experience for 2016.
1. Create a ‘pleasure chest’
“Keep a pleasure chest by your bedside containing lubricants, massage oils, sex toys, handcuffs, blindfolds, Ben Wa balls, candles, just about anything you can get ahold of that may stimulate the mood,” Green said. “That way, in the heat of moment, no one has to pause to go for items needed to heighten the encounter. If you use condoms, you may try adding flavoured ones to your collection. If you are crazy about cunnilingus, then you may also consider adding items such as mints, candies, deep throat sprays or gels specially formulated to create the ultimate experience.” She added that edible undies and flavoured lubricants are also good additions to the pleasure chest.
2. More foreplay
Green said foreplay works all the time. “You may reinvigorate your partner’s sense of touch by sprinkling massage oil on his body, then using your hands or a feather to gently make patterns over his skin. Rub yourself against him. Climb on top of him and feel him. Take his hand and put it where you want it to go. Circle your hips and help him. Foreplay makes everything more exciting,” she said.
3. Tweak what you already know
Green said couples often tend to settle into a few tried and tested positions that they have grown accustomed to. She said while this is not such a bad thing, it would be an even greater experience if for every position you are comfortable with, you found ways to tweak it and create a new position from it.
4. Ask for it
“Be completely open with your partner about sex. Have a conversation about your bedroom habits. For example, ask if there is anything he would like you to do more or what he dislikes. You just may discover that you and your partner may be curious to explore the same fantasies. Establish an agreement, then go for it,” she said.
