Why some men prefer older women

A man can find a woman who is many years younger than he is without raising too many eyebrows, but alas, when the table is turned and a more mature woman takes on a younger man, she’s seen as a cougar or he is seen as an opportunist, especially if she has money.

However, there are men out there who really do seem to love older women and are not driven by what they have materially. So what’s the attraction for these younger men? I asked some of my male friends who are with older women and among the explanations were the following:

1. Older women know how to boost a man’s ego

Older women apparently understand men more. An older woman knows from experience that a man likes to have his ego massaged. She knows that feeling wanted, needed and appreciated is important to a man and the more she makes him feel like Superman, the more appreciative he is of her. If you fail to make a man feel like he is needed, quite possibly he’ll end up with someone who does.

2. Older women have more realistic expectations

Men like a woman who is mature in her behaviour, thinking and expectations as it relates to a relationship. No relationship will be perfect, but older women have a more realistic approach to dealing with issues in their relationship. The older a woman is, the less likely she is to expect that she will meet ‘the perfect guy’.

3. Older women are more sexually experienced

It’s no secret that sex and intimacy are important in a relationship, and men value a woman who is comfortable with her sexuality and is confident in bed. Whilst a younger woman sometimes has insecurities about her body and is perhaps looking to learn from her partner, older women know and say what they want and are often more focused on satisfying their partners.

4. Older women already know what they want

While a younger woman might still be in the experimental stage where choosing a partner is concerned, an older woman, because of her experience, is usually more aware of what she wants in a man. An older woman might have been through the ups and downs and is at a point in her life where she knows what’s important in a partner and what isn’t. The superficial things will not weigh as heavily as they do for a younger woman.

5. Older women are more independent in dealing with issues

There are exceptions to every rule, including age and independence, but for the most part older women are more likely to be independent in their thinking, actions and personal situations. Most men do not like when women feel compelled to make their decisions based on the advice of their mothers or girlfriends. They like women who are independent thinkers, and who are mature in their approach to decision making.

6. Older women are more likely to be economically independent

Yes, there are men who are making it very clear from the onset that they do not want a woman who will be totally dependent on them to pay their bills. An older woman who perhaps has her own house, a decent-paying job, and some money invested, will find favour with a man who is looking for a woman who can stand on her feet financially.

7. Older women are focused on the things that matter

Men like women who are not caught up in the superficial. They prefer a woman who is level-headed and not materialistic. Older women tend to be less focused on the trivial things such as wearing the latest styles and more focused on family and building and sustaining a good relationship.

8. Older women are more interested in committing

After a certain age, sometimes mid-30s, most women want to be in a committed relationship that will lead to marriage. A man who is interested in settling down knows that an older woman is less likely to be interested in casual dating.

Marie Berbick, aka The PR Girl, is a communications specialist, motivational speaker and founder of the women’s ministry Sisters United for Prayer, Healing, Empowerment & Restoration (SUPHER). Follow her on Twitter @thePR Girl or e-mail marieberbick@gmail.com.