Proposals gone wrong
MARRIAGE proposals are usually romantic and leave people awe-struck in a positive way. But there’s also the flip side of a perfectly planned method to pop the question — when things go horribly wrong. Below readers share their experiences:
Markland L:
It’s a wonder that I can laugh about this now. But when Emancipation Park had just opened, one evening I took my then girlfriend there for a stroll, and wanting to be over the top, I decided to pop the question in front of the Redemption Song statues. Well, the ring fell inside the little water fountain and I stood there searching for it and people were cheering her on. I thought, yes man, she must be waiting for me to locate it to shout yes. I only heard when she said, “Mark, stop looking for it, I’m not ready.” At that point I wanted to drop in the fountain too.
Daneth W:
My boyfriend proposed and my best friend interjected with a strong opposition and even pulled out her phone with text messages that showed he was hitting on her. I asked her why she didn’t say something earlier and her response was that she never expected him to propose and she believed it was one of those relationships that would just eventually fizzle out.
Chana-Lee O:
I was the one who made it horrible. Growing up I was always told that if something wasn’t working out and I wanted to part ways I shouldn’t feel guilty or be trapped into changing my mind. I was dating someone within my church and the relationship deteriorated. I decided this wasn’t what I wanted, there was no sense of fulfilment, and I realised I was just going with the flow as it was the norm or seemed like the right thing to do. So I decided to break it off in an amicable way. I told him it wasn’t working out, explained it to him, and we parted silently. Now, about two months later I’m sitting in church one afternoon as the announcements are being read, and see photos of me and him going across the projector. So I smiled faintly, thinking it was an error as our youth group documented a lot of its outreach programmes in pictures. So I said maybe they touched the wrong folder. Then I see the words, ‘Chan, I love you’. To cut a long story short, he took the mic and began a long speech. I sat, listened, and as he said “Will you marry me”, I got up and went through the door to the bus stop and went home. For a while I was judged and crucified about how I dealt with the situation, but with time, my church family understood my position.
Jermaine P:
I proposed to her at my birthday party in front of my parents, family, work colleagues, people I went to college with, high school with, and her legs gave way. When she composed herself I believed it was a yes, and she was just flattered that she couldn’t stand. But she simply stood, located her purse, said ‘I’m sorry’ and walked out. DJ on pause, everybody on pause, I was just left on pause and dumbfounded.
Orlando A:
There’s a saying that you must face your fears to conquer them, but what do you do if they conquer you? I asked my ex-wife to marry me at a concert and I don’t like being the centre of attention. She said she had to think about it when she was handed the mic to answer, much to the chagrin of every single person there. She eventually answered, and it was obvious that it wasn’t meant to be from the beginning.
Marcine FJ:
It was horrible, but we got married anyway. We had an argument before, and he tossed the ring at me and said, ‘I wanted to ask properly but I’m too upset. Give me an answer and let’s move on.’ I tossed it back and said, ‘If you really mean this, you figure out a better way to ask.’ Two weeks later he called and apologised and we went out. Two weeks after that, he took me to dinner again and asked properly. We will be married for 11 years come November.
