Things a good man would never do to you

IT’S just one of the few things that every woman needs — a good man. And it can be quite difficult identifying the sheep from the wolves, especially when they have contradicting traits. But counselling psychologist Dr Ivret Williams has shared a list of traits below that separates the good men from the rest.

A good man:

Would never reprimand you in public or in private

Speaking ill about your woman in public and even in private is like defacing a building. A good man aims to defend and protect his woman. Additionally, scorching words can batter a woman’s self-esteem and a good man is mindful of this. He also knows that if there are concerns, he should express them in a respectful manner instead of belittling his partner with hurtful comments.

Would never downplay your achievements

Whether you believe that her degree can’t compare to your two masters and PhD, it should never result in you making her feel less accomplished than she is. Similarly, your lack of a tertiary education doesn’t mean that you should belittle her accomplishment. A good man knows that his woman’s accomplishment reflects well on him.

Would never abuse you

Whether it’s physical, psychological or emotional abuse, a good man would never inflict scars on his woman or children. A good man knows that abusing his biologically weaker partner verbally or physically will not solve the problem, but could certainly make matters worse.

Would never cheat

Being faithful is the cornerstone of a relationship. By potentially exposing you to the possibility of another woman feeling as though she has something over you, to sexually transmitted diseases and even the possibility of fathering a child outside of the union, or some other associated consequence that could jeopardise the union, a good man knows that cheating is not an option. It means going against a verbal and/or written commitment to love, cherish and not to cause harm emotionally or otherwise to his woman.

Would never encourage division in his family

A major source of division in many families is a man’s decision to show or tell his children that they do not have to honour the wishes of their mother. A good man would not speak down to his woman, especially in the presence of the children; go back on decisions that she has made, or that he made without consulting her, or abuse her in the presence of the children because he disagrees with the mother’s decisions. This sends the wrong message to children, and encourages disrespect and manipulation of the mother.

Would never leave his family

A good man doesn’t just leave his family because he believes he has found a woman who better suits his needs. No good man would refrain from providing for his family while doing this. By so doing, he would be leaving his home unprotected, as men are regarded as the natural defenders of the family.

Would never discourage you

A relationship is about two people who not only love but support each other. If a man discourages you from doing something that you love, especially if there is no merit to his argument, then he is not good for you, neither does he deserve you.

Would never undervalue you

Whether it is not valuing your opinions, contributions to the relationship, constantly having something negative to say about your appearance – even though you have put a lot of thought into the way you look, or saying if it wasn’t for his child he wouldn’t be with you, a real man never does these things, because he knows the value of his woman.