Signs your partner won’t make a good parent
NO one is ever 100 per cent ready for parenting, as having a child comes with a long list of responsibilities that you are never prepared for. Each child is different and will need different methods of parenting, and it takes a committed effort on the part of the parents to make it work.
Guidance counsellor Violet Brown has dealt with various types of parents in her work, and has seen first-hand some of the negative effects of bad parenting on children. She says if you are thinking of starting a family, or blending one, there are some signs you should look out for that indicate your partner is totally unfit for parenthood.
1. Immaturity
If your partner is immature, this is a red flag that he/she is unable to cope with the emotional requirements of caring for another human being, especially a child. They may display inappropriate outbursts and seldom take responsibility for their behaviour.
2. Perverted/flirtatious behaviour
You must be careful if your partner displays these tendencies. Perverts cannot be trusted under any circumstances, and such individuals must be kept away from children. No sensible parent wants a pervert to deal with their offspring. If you make the unwise choice of such a person as co-parent, you will have to monitor your child 24/7.
3. Abusive
If your partner is abusive to you, he/she will behave similarly towards your children. A child who is abused physically, emotionally, verbally or sexually will be traumatised, and will end up suffering from depression, aggression, withdrawal, and suicidal thoughts. Anyone who causes this to happen to a child is not to be considered as a suitable co-parent.
4. Drug addiction
A parent-to-be who is addicted to drugs can hardly be considered worthy of rearing children. This person may stay out all night due to intoxication, which will also lead to an inability to attend to the child left in their care, thus exposing the child to danger. There is also the possibility of the child being left unattended and hungry for extended hours while the addict goes in search of resources to satisfy his/her addiction.
5. He/she is not interested in, or is annoyed by other people’s children
Whenever this happens, some people are quick to blame the personality of the child and bad parenting. This is not necessarily so. This is a sign that deep down your partner does not want children. In all likelihood they will behave this way with their own children.
6. Selfishness
Selfishness is an obvious sign that your partner is unsuited for parenthood. This behaviour manifests itself in numerous ways — unwilling to share, uncaring, stingy, etc. It may lead to animosity and resentment of the minor. In the end, it would be as if you were a single parent.
