The good wife – Tips on how to please your husband

A recommendation sheet on how to please your husband, taken from a 1950s Home Economics book, outlines eight things women should do to ensure that their husbands are satisfied, which are akin to making preparations for royalty or an esteemed guest.

The list includes having a warm dinner ready for him each night he gets home, even if it means staying up all night to pre-prep; taking at least 15 minutes to rest, touch up your make-up and prepare yourself before he gets home; clearing away the clutter and dusting the home before he arrives; preparing the children; minimising all noise; and not complaining if he is late for dinner or about any other issues when he arrives home.

The goal, according to the list, is to make your home a place of peace and order where your husband can renew himself in body and spirit.

They may seem like goals more suited to the pre-feminist era, before even the time of the much-criticised Betty Friedan who became a force for change of traditional gender roles, as she explored the idea of women finding personal fulfilment outside of their traditional roles in the home. And many would say there is no place in modern society for such rules.

But is this really true? The men All Woman spoke to were in full agreement with the list, with one even saying it’s not much to ask, even while the women balked at the suggestions. Their responses are below:

Rick S:

It is perfect, not ridiculous. When a man or husband reaches home, he wants to feel appreciated. But can a wife keep up with that if she is not a stay-at-home mom and she also goes out to work and doesn’t necessarily reach home before her husband? Coming home to a tidy house, listening to how your husband’s day was, are good. His home must be a place of peace.

John J:

The list was written in 1950 and was true to the day. But truth be told, I know some “bougie” girls who do the first five on the list without worries. A man must come home to a tidy, well kept, clean, quiet house with food freshly prepared. His clothes must be ironed and neatly stored. I hate kitchen clutter, like seeing pots, dishes, plates not properly stored. They should be tucked away neatly in a cupboard after every meal; the kitchen counter must be empty, likewise food stuff. Honey must also be fresh like the day we first met. Is that too much to ask?

Dale J:

The list is spot on. Only thing missing is to please him orally every other morning.

Ruth P:

The list was written in the 1950s when most women were not permitted to go to college. The men were the breadwinners and deemed king of the home. This is the 21st century. Women are now working wives and mothers, plus some are also breadwinners. I am not saying women of today cannot do all those things, but they would have to be stay-at-home moms. That, however, is a matter of choice. Now don’t get me wrong. While I am on holidays I cook for my family and I enjoy keeping my house extra clean and tidy. I also like to see hubby eat when I cook and tell me that the meal is tasty. Up to today I wash and iron his clothes for him along with mine and the children’s, and I love when he puts on his shirt and looks clean and smells nice, so part of me is old school. The children are playful and quarrelling, noise is part of the peace that my husband comes home to, because the children expect him to engage them in conversation.

Kerry-Ann G:

Some men still expect these things based on how they were brought up, and some based on the idea of how they think their lives should be. I think it is absolutely ridiculous, and for the most part has no place in the life of a working woman. Can you imagine going to work and having to come home to do all these things to that extent? And you have kids? It is not fair for us to both work outside, and the woman must come home to a second and third shift. Incomes and spending power have for the most part diminished, so the need for multiple incomes is there. Big man is not the only person carrying home the bacon; he has to pitch in. In my household, my hubby has his defined chores and I’m not going to beg him to do them, like some women do. If he doesn’t do them they will be left undone. He knows he must prepare breakfast. Mind you, we rarely get ackee and saltfish with green banana, but he has to prepare something for us, and I do dinner.

Anastasia T:

If my husband subscribed to this list, he would have divorced me long ago. It’s absolutely ridiculous.

Marie G:

The list has some truth to it. It seems to reflect the time period where the man was sole breadwinner and the woman was housewife, but it does have some good points.

Donna W:

I guess wife in this context is a housewife and men are meant to be treated like a king, but I am not sure if it’s a reality for most women. Responsibilities should be shared, but men can’t handle pressure, so women have to try and make them comfortable. Why do you think there are so many men in bars and sports bars? I give my husband his time to settle when he gets home, then he does his responsibilities when he is ready. I try not to stress him.

Penny E:

Most of it is good. But it was very applicable when women were stay-at-home moms. Sound advice nonetheless, and I’ve come to realise men value all said. “Never complain if he never takes you to dinner or other entertainment” is a tall ask. Whereas you may not complain, I think there should be place for suggestions, subtle or direct. Husbands should be thoughtful of their wives, and going out helps to rekindle the flames of the relationship. Couples should continue to date each other.

Fay R:

It is most applicable to stay-at-home moms. I like the part that states that the home should be a place of peace and quietness. We should both work towards this, not just the woman.