Should you demand a ring?
The day a woman walks down the aisle to the man she adores is one day every woman looks forward to. But what happens when you have been dating someone for an extended period with no ring discussions? Should a woman confront her man and tell him it is time? Should she lay down the law and demand that a ring be bought and placed on her finger?
We asked several women who have been in long-term common-law relationships to share their experiences.
Nadine:
I have been with my man for eight years and not once has he mentioned marriage. At first it bothered me but after a while I stopped caring because we already live with each other and we have three boys so technically, we’re already married. I just told myself that I already have a family, and a ring is just a ring.
Rosie:
My man told me he is not interested in getting married because that is how most relationships fail and he wants us to last. But I know he is simply afraid of commitment and that scares me because I am currently pregnant. I am uncomfortable about it and I encourage young women to wait for marriage first before getting pregnant.
Kelly:
Recently I stumbled on a post on Instagram that was funny but real – that if you are dating for over four years and there’s no marriage in the mix, that is a relationship management course and not a relationship. I am serious about my future so last year I gave my man an ultimatum because after six years, you’re supposed know if I am the one or not. We got married four months ago and life is still sweet and I hope it will continue to be. Moral of my story: Sometimes a woman has got to take control to get what she deserves.
Pat:
Personally, I am not into marriage and all that because growing up, I saw what marriage did to my parents and I recently rejected a proposal. He was sad about it but he will get over it. I am not walking down that street that my mother did. So for me it is the other way around where my man wants marriage and I simply do not.
EC:
This might sound deceptive but I basically told my man that I am thinking of becoming a Christian and that means I cannot have sex outside of marriage and you know he went and bought an engagement ring. I thought that was sweet because men these days would just move on but he saw to it that I got what I wanted. Truth is, we have been with each other for almost four years and I simply think it is time we settle down the right way in marriage.
