The audacity of men
MEN can be audacious. Their willingness to take big risks and make demands to get what they want, regardless of the consequences, is sometimes admirable, and some of us might even find it sexy. And when it comes to relationships, they are just as brazen. They have no qualms about making their requests known to women, and are so confident in themselves while doing so that we might even start to wonder if we are wrong to not give in immediately.
Whether it’s in the workplace, the home, romantic arrangements, or in the bedroom, men expect women to be OK with some unbelievably ridiculous things. These women share situations in which they found themselves which caused them to stop and think, “What a man bright!”
Natasha, 29, PR account executive:
I still can’t believe the nerve of those ancient-days Jamaican men who expect certain services, but don’t want to reciprocate. But I think it’s us as women who spoil them and make them feel as if our bodies are a gift to them, and we shouldn’t get anything out of it. My ex and I broke up because he didn’t like to please me, he was very unfit, and he just wasn’t satisfying me and he refused to learn. I’m sorry, but that “I’m satisfied by keeping you satisfied” narrative doesn’t do it for me.
Geenelle, 25, writer:
I once had a man come up to me, introduce himself, and strike up a conversation. I was feeling him a bit, but I had to leave. He asked to borrow my phone for a second, and he put his number in, and I thought he would then ring his phone to get my number, but instead he saved it to my phone as “undercover” and told me that I should only call him in the daytime because his girlfriend is a little paranoid. I just stood there dumbfounded. Did this man seriously think I would call his phone and pursue him? Plus, with his crazy girlfriend?
Maxine, 30, make-up artist:
I was dating a man who worked at a law firm. He wasn’t a lawyer but he was making decent money. For all I knew he drove, because he always had cars in the background of his pictures and he was always talking about his ‘car’, but I’d never been in it. But anyway we were talking for a couple months and it was time to do the deed. My friend dropped me off at his place on our way from work (the house was way larger than I expected for someone who lived alone). We had a fun night and it was all good until I woke up the next morning and needed to go home. This man tried to tell me that the BMW parked at the house was having ‘car trouble’ so he couldn’t drop me home, and was directing me to the bus stop. I called a taxi and never spoke to him again.
Shari, 27, accountant:
He wanted me to give my salary to him every month, and then he would share it up and then give me back a portion to spend. He was also an accountant, and he was extremely frugal — to the point where it was annoying — but he had some nerve thinking I would live off an allowance out of my paycheque just because we were living together. Bright!
Kerry, 31, media practioner:
I told this guy I was dating about one time in college when my lesbian friend and I fooled around and how funny it was because I was clearly straight. But he just had it in his head from then that I went both ways and would someday have a threesome with him. He was always talking about it and showing other women to me, asking if I thought they were sexy. He even called me one day saying he met a girl who seemed kinky and if I wanted to meet her. He became obsessed with the idea. I started feeling inadequate in bed. We broke up eventually.
Nikita, 34, sales officer:
There was a man who worked at my last workplace who was rumoured to be messing with half the female complement of staff. A few weeks into the job he was very friendly towards me, but I thought he was harmless so I didn’t pay him much attention. One day I was having a banana in the lunch room and a text came in on my phone. It said, “Look me in the eye when you’re doing that“. He was the only one in the room, and he was staring right at me. I told him off and he never even looked in my direction again.
