Brazen, brutal, hot bun

IT has been the feature of movies and music for ages — a phenomenon that has been the topic of many studies, and temptations that even the finest in God’s eyes have been unable to resist. The desires of the flesh, the coveting of another person’s significant other, have made grown men sin and grown women yield to their most primitive desires.

Wanting someone who is betrothed to another is for some the ultimate sin, yet for others there’s a certain thrill that comes with playing the field. And while many people who are participants in this game manage to play it in secrecy, there are others who serve it as a dish so cold, so brazen and audacious, that it intensifies the misery of the offended.

What has been the most barefaced way a partner has cheated on you?

Chris, 25:

She was going overseas on assignment and apparently made plans to meet up with a guy she had known for years. She was all lovey-dovey with me before she left — I even drove her to the airport and she kissed and hugged me goodbye. I would have never suspected a thing, had it not been for technology. On the Saturday night we FaceTimed each other well into the night, before she said she was tired and had to go. On the Sunday morning she FaceTimed me again, and while she was moving the phone around to give me a virtual tour of her hotel room, I spotted size 14 yellow Jordans next to her luggage. I asked her who the shoes belonged to and she hung up the phone. When I tried to call back there was no answer for all of that day. You know what she told me when she finally called back Sunday night? That the shoes belonged to the hotel maintenance people who had been in the room to fix the heater, and she had filed a report as they were careless. It was when she came back to Jamaica and I confronted her face to face that she finally admitted that she had been in touch with the guy and had spent the weekend with him, and he was even in the room laughing at me while she was FaceTiming me.

Kenroy, 28:

I was dating this older woman — we were practically living together — until one day she told me that I had to leave for a couple weeks because her son’s father was coming from overseas and he needed somewhere to stay. She assured me that there was nothing going on between them, but for some reason it was OK for him to stay at her house, and for me to leave. She ghosted me for about a week into his visit, and I could only keep up with the exploits of the happy couple on Instagram. I decided that we were done before he left, and when she finally contacted me after his visit, I told her it was over.

Racine, 37:

In this case it’s pretty barefaced, but while all of us can see it, the poor man who was conned refuses to believe it. There’s a couple — two dark-skinned people — and they had their first child, who favours them both. The woman got pregnant again, and had a second child who is very light-skinned — you know that German town St Elizabeth hue? The baby has an eerie resemblance to the next door neighbour who would help around the house while the man was away on the farm work programme. Now everybody knows that it’s the neighbour’s kid, but to his credit the man accepts the child as his, even though we had to warn the woman to stop putting the baby in the sun to “catch colour”, as everyday she would put the poor child outside in an attempt to help darken the baby’s skin.

Ann-Marie, 45:

This is why I always tell women not to have any young girls coming into their homes for live-in work. This was a decade ago and I had just given birth and my husband and I decided that instead of daycare we would hire a live-in nanny. My family suggested this neighbour’s daughter from the country who was sitting at home not doing anything, so I said OK. Even though she was very young, she was a Christian so I figured she would be OK. She was a good fit at first — she would sing to the baby, read her Bible, and tell me that she would only watch wholesome programmes on TV. Now I’m usually a sound sleeper, but this particular night I woke up, checked on the baby, then proceeded down the hallway on the way to the living room to look for my husband as I thought he had fallen asleep on the couch as usual. Well lo and behold, he was on the couch alright, but she was beneath him and uttering the most unChristian-like words. I didn’t even say anything, just turned back and went back to bed contemplating my next move. And you know when I brought it up the next day the man had the nerve to tell me that I must have been sleepwalking?

Mahalia, 38:

I met my son’s dad one summer while he was visiting my community to see family. He was permanently stationed in another parish, but was spending a couple months in my town. We hit it off right away and I also got pregnant within a short time, only for him to reveal that his girlfriend — who I was just hearing about — was also pregnant, and he would be returning home to be with her. Needless to say I was devastated, but I hoped and prayed for the best. He called me a few weeks later, saying that she had kicked him out upon hearing my news, and he would return to be with me. I loved him and wanted my son to have his father, so I said yes. All this time he had a rocky relationship with his first child’s mother — sure she had kicked him out, but she never got over his betrayal and I think she was embarrassed having a child just a few months older than mine, and just being in that kind of situation generally. So I always encouraged him to appease her as much as possible, and she soon relaxed enough to have him visit the child for an extended period. At the same time of this visit we were preparing for our wedding, and I was over the moon. Well, he went to see her and the baby for a four-day weekend, and returned and we continued planning our wedding. She called the day before my wedding to tell me that they had slept together during their visit, and he had begged her to take him back as she was his soulmate. She said she ran him like a dog, and told me that I deserved his fleas and that she hoped I hurt as badly as she had months before. That was the most devastating thing to have ever happened to me; even worse was when he didn’t lie about it when I asked, and only shrugged when I asked whether he loved me. We didn’t get married but we’re still together, and I live daily with the knowledge that if she called right now he would go running back to her because he still loves her.