When did you realise your partner didn’t love you anymore?
SOMETIMES it creeps up on you — the signs are subtle — a word here, a gesture there, slight disrespect, something said to friends, to family, and you suspect that the affection is waning. That’s usually the first step, and then it escalates, and pretty soon, someone is using the H word.
When did you realise that your partner didn’t love you anymore?
Wendy, 32:
He started making little comments about how I parented, how I kept the house, and how I’d let myself go, and at the same time he was staying out later, dyed his hair, started working out at the back of the house, and rejected my attempts at intimacy. Realising that someone is falling out of love with you is hard, especially when the things they hate in those moments were things they praised you for before.
Sarah, 30:
We had a party at our house and he ignored me the whole night, even though I’d gone to the salon and bought new clothes just to please him. In front of our friends and family, he treated me like I didn’t exist, and like an idiot I was going from person to person starting conversations to kind of convince people that all was well.
Laura, 28:
He stopped calling to check up on me during the day — literally did not care how I got to work and how and when I got home, if I ate, or anything like that. The icing on the cake was when I got a flat tyre in the ghetto and called him (usually he would come help me from wherever he was) and he suggested that I ask someone for help or drive to the nearest tyre shop. We didn’t have a falling out or anything, he just stopped caring about my general safety and well-being.
Tonya, 33:
He acted like I didn’t exist — we lived together but he acted like he couldn’t bear to be near me. Before, he would leave home at 9:00 am, and sometimes I’d see him back home as early as 4:30pm. Then he started leaving as soon as he woke up and showered, got home later and later, even though he knew I needed help with the kids, and weekends and holidays seemed unbearable for him — like he dreaded the thought of being home and was stifling. It was hard to watch, it was like his family was his burden, and he hated bearing it.
Jess, 30:
The same family who he told me he hated and didn’t get along with were the same people he started telling our business to, then started blaming me for keeping him away from them. Then they started accusing me of being the one to tear their family apart, even though I’d always been the one to encourage contact. He treated me like I was the problem, because he wasn’t man enough to just leave when he didn’t want to be with me anymore.
Nicole, 40:
Simple — the disrespect started, like he was testing me to see how much I’d put up with. He’d make little dirty remarks, little comments, like I was some gyal on the road, and as if he was daring me to say something. Once the disrespect starts, might as well you end it, because there’s no getting better after that.
