Hidden lovers

PEOPLE will make time for who they want. And if someone loves you, they will make time for you. So when you’re not being acknowledged, do you read it as them being too busy to spend time with you, though they still love you? Or do you, like the people below, marvel at the steps they will take to hide, rather than acknowledge you?

Chloe, 34:

Both my birthday and the anniversary of the day we met were coming up in the same month as Valentine’s Day, so I was expecting a ton of love from the man I had been seriously dating for two years. One day I jokingly reminded him of all the loving I was expecting, and asked if he’d finally be posting me on social media like I did with him. The next day, my boyfriend scrubbed his Instagram page of all posts, put a black screen as his profile photo, and told me that he was coming off IG because it was “boring”. He did the same with Facebook, then told me that he was only going to use his WhatsApp for work posts and nothing else. So rather than posting about our love, he preferred to come off social media completely so he wouldn’t have to post me.

Jaya, 24:

He never messages me first or offers to take me out, and we’ve been together since 2019. First his excuse was that it was COVID time and we had to stay away from people. Nowadays, he still wears a mask and talks about germs everywhere, whenever I ask him to go out. Yet, when he’s with his friends and family, he’s posting status updates showing him having fun with no COVID restrictions. So I know it’s me that is the problem, but he hasn’t outrightly said so.

Shane, 30:

She said she was busy and was working crazy hours, and that’s why she was always unavailable. Yet, even though she wasn’t responding to my calls and texts, she was the first one viewing my status each time I posted. Eventually I started posting another woman to try to get a reaction, and that’s when she messaged me, inviting me to a work event.

Nikoya, 25:

He kept saying that he was busy with work ever since he got a promotion. He would never have time to talk or for messaging, as he said he had to put on a professional face at work. I was trying so hard to make it work that I would just take what little time he offered, every few days or so, when he had a break and could hang out at my place. But then one day I found out by accident that he wasn’t all that important in his job, and the “promotion” actually gave him more free time than he had before. This guy was literally just doing graphics in a back room at his office and had many hours of downtime while he waited on projects to be approved. And he would spend that time watching porn, when he claimed he was so busy, and not with me.

Gus, 38:

I was dating this Jamaican girl and I guess she was a little embarrassed about the fact that I was a little overweight, and even though she wanted my money, she didn’t want anyone to know we were together. So when I visited at Christmas and she brought me to her family home I was introduced as her friend, even though we were engaged, and none of her other family or friends met me. When I asked, she just said she was a very private person. But then, one time I saw some messages between her and her sister where she confessed that she was “weirded out” by my fatness, but she tolerated me because I was helping her through college.