That best friend
MOST of us should be able to count at least five close friends who we would do almost anything for and support in most of their endeavours. And among those friends there is usually one ultimate individual that nothing can separate us from — the best friend.
However, when that best friend is of the opposite sex, people usually ponder the reason for the friendship and wonder if there are any hidden motives from either party — be it a secret attraction, a fizzled love that has settled, or an opportunistic move. And when one party moves into a relationship with someone else, often the new partner will have problems with the friendship.
What would you do if your lover had a best friend of the opposite sex? Would you be comfortable allowing such a friendship to continue?
Annette:
I don’t want my man having a female best friend, so I would not want a male best friend unless it’s my brother.
Emily:
I don’t have a problem with having a male best friend. They can be cushion for many issues. But I have an issue with my significant other having a female best friend. You know what your partner is capable of. I know that on my end it wouldn’t go beyond a friendship, but at the same time I know his weaknesses and I don’t trust him enough to establish his own boundaries.
Stacy:
I don’t see any issues with having a male best friend, as in my estimation they understand issues that affect women more than our girlfriends do. They are a good shoulder to cry on and a cushion for all of our issues. But I don’t want my boyfriend crying on any woman’s shoulder.
Renee:
No. I don’t believe in it and that’s simply because no woman wants her man to have a female best friend, so why the double standard?
Trevor:
Yes, why not? If they are moving in a direction which seems intimate then I will have a problem. I would be OK with it, but I would constantly look over my shoulder.
Dwight:
It’s OK, but if I see actions that indicate more than friendship, I’m drawing the line. But I really don’t trust women. They can be both the best and worst things to happen to you.
Dave:
If he’s gay, then fine, but if he’s hetero, worse, a macho male, then no. I say no because I have close female friends and I know how men think. The only reason I have never crossed the line is out of respect.
Anton:
If the friendship existed before I came into the picture and I can see that he is genuinely her friend and confidant, I would be selfish to ask her to end it. If it’s a run of the mill guy who is just there waiting for me to fail and jump in, I’m going to have issues with him. Plus boundaries exist in every aspect of life, so I would expect this best friend to know his place and in all honesty, though I would respect the friendship, I would also watch him with many eyes.
