Worst places I’ve hooked up
SEX beyond the walls of the bedroom is on almost everyone’s bucket list. But sometimes experimenting in new places with the associated risk of extreme discomfort and accidents is more than you originally bargained for.
All Woman asked readers to share the worst locations where they have done the deed. Here’s what they had to say:
Sam:
There was an event at the Portmore Mall and my man and I got heated and we just decided to do it there. I think we should have considered that other people felt like we did and would be hunting these spots as well, because no less than ten couples must have turned up while we were getting busy. There was also no support for holding on, and the fact that I was drunk didn’t help at all.
Tashana:
The worst place was in some bushes. My man and I were coming from the airport in Montego Bay and we were touching each other and so on since we hadn’t seen each other in over a year. After talking about it for so long he suggested we stop somewhere, and since adventures are our thing, we hit the bushes. Well, turns out MoBay cowitch stings, bites and bruises. I had to go to the doctor as I was allergic.
Orando:
On an ackee tree limb. It was close to a sand heap and sturdy, but not too sturdy. The good thing is that it was close to the supporting tree. The offside was the army of ants that attacked the girl and the near-death collision between my testicles and the limb as I tried to get down so I could help her.
K:
In the busy Spanish Town square in the back of a car that didn’t have a dark tint. It was late evening and from my first analysis people wouldn’t notice the car shaking, but who was I fooling? It turns out some people viewed a good afternoon show. I am shameless, so it didn’t bother me at all, but I had qualms about the lady’s feelings.
Des:
Don’t believe the movies. I repeat, don’t believe the movies. Shower sex is not as good as it looks on TV. Not only is the woman not usually as pliable, but sadly for me, trying harder left me with a sprained ankle and a busted head.
Nina:
In a graveyard, on a couch-structured kind of grave. I felt like something was haunting me.
Gerald:
When I was younger we had a lot of pit latrines in the country and for those of you who know, rodents sometimes frequent these areas. So we were there getting our groove on when this cat-sized rat jumped on us. While I wrestled the thing, I heard my girl scream and scream and jumped from the toilet seat. As it turns out, a roach bit her on her too-too. Well, the groove ended there as little Miss Stushy locked shop, but if my memory serves me right, somehow, months later, we ended up there again, incident-free that time, luckily.
