She wants equal rights and justice
SINCE its recent release, there has been much furore among men over Ishawna’s song, Equal Rights and Justice, so much so that men have even threatened harm to women who have defended the singer’s stance on oral sex. Horrified yet? Comments from men under the song’s YouTube video have labelled the women who have defended their right to demand reciprocity in oral sex as, among other cruel names, “nasty waste gals” who should have been aborted or who deserve to be killed. This vitriol has spilled over into the counteractions by male artistes in the dancehall who have also reacted in the negative, and even selectors who refuse to play the song, which in essence only calls for a man who demands oral sex from his woman to be prepared to reciprocate.
Should women demand equal rights, as Ishawna calls it? From the responses on social media, women largely agree that they deserve equal treatment. But why have men reacted with such venom, to the point of even threatening violence?Counsellor David Anderson said it’s all in the culture of the dancehall, which has eschewed ‘bowing’ from the days of Shabba Ranks in the 1990s, a tradition that even continues today, the millennial age.“Though we have evolved, this is one area in which dancehall is still stuck, and refusing to progress on,” Anderson said. “So while Kartel will praise the ‘freaky gal’ for performing fellatio, and the men will sing along, woe be unto the man who actually gives in return and admits it.”It’s a double standard, he said, that is rooted in patriarchy, where the man is seen as the head, all-demanding, all-deserving, and the woman should submit to all his demands, and expect nothing in return.“So her satisfaction is secondary to his. So what if she is unable to orgasm from penetration alone? The typical Jamaican man will never seek to overtly please her, because dancehall says it’s wrong.”For Debra B, 30, this is the reason she will not date Jamaican men, as they “are literally stuck in the Stone Age”.“They are stupid, stuck in this mindset that some activities in the bedroom are still taboo, while their counterparts in the Caribbean and the world are indulging and passing them by. There is no longer the belief that Jamaican men make great lovers. All they are good for is daggering, and nobody wants that anymore!”Anderson said much of the venom being spewed by men in reaction to the song could be fake outrage — an effort to convince their ‘brethren’ that they are not indulging, when they actually are.“If you ask the women, 98 per cent of them will tell you that their husbands or boyfriends are engaging in oral sex. So which men are truly not doing it? In fact, most are doing it in the bedroom but would never admit it on the street.”All Woman asked women, do you demand ‘equal rights’?
Joy B, 42, married:Of course. It’s an equal partnership based on mutual satisfaction. My husband knows that it is expected. He has never been foolish enough to state a preference for anything else.
Nathalie S, 22, in a relationship:I think the men who are perturbed are the less educated men. On campus, the academics know that oral pleasure is the standard by which all men are judged.
Shauna W, 36, engaged:Of course I demand it! And my guy does not shy away. He will happily partake all day, like it gives him energy. Lol.
Michelle M, 40, dating:I don’t think it’s an issue that’s up for debate. The kind of men I date are not averse to the idea of pleasing their women.
Shelly-Ann B, 26, engaged:My fiancé, who partakes by the way, feigned being outraged at what Ishawna was demanding. He said he wasn’t in agreement with what she was singing, and that women shouldn’t be demanding equal rights. He was actually pretty angry, until I reminded him that he was a willing indulger in oral sex each and every time we have sex, even without me asking. Then he got silent. I think there is a natural inclination by Jamaican men to lick out, excuse my pun, at everything, even when they are enjoying all and sundry in the bedroom.
Nicole P, 27, married:I printed out the lyrics for my husband. It’s important that he gets some guidance, as while he was doing it all along, he was doing it all wrong. Who knew that I was supposed to be getting the bag juice and French fries treatment all this time?
Anabella B, 33, single:Let’s just say, I’ve always demanded this, and no guy has ever refused. In fact, some will say that it’s their speciality long before we get to the bedroom. Trust me, all the men who are outraged are lying. It’s a long time Jamaican men have been providing equal rights, dem just fraid fi seh so.
