Are you dating a leech?
CHALLENGES are a natural part of every relationship, but if your love life feels like it is sucking the life out of you — and your bank account — then it is highly likely that you are in a parasitic relationship. But how do you know when your partner is leeching off you? Relationship counsellor Wayne Powell has shared a list of traits that parasitic partners carry.
Your partner wants you to deny yourself and provide him with all the things he wants (not needs)
Your partner is extra nice to you when he wants something. He will even go as far as to guilt or manipulate you into buying him material things even if he knows that you need the money. Also, even though you both have jobs, you spend way more on him than you do on yourself.
He plays mind games
If you are unable to grant a request, especially because you have to take care of something for yourself, he will make you feel bad for denying him his requests. He will even go as far as to question your love for him, threaten to leave you, or he may make a scene causing you to give in to his demands.
He is always borrowing from you, and never repays
Your partner constantly wants you to lend him money, even though you already have to take care of all the bills. To make things worse, he never repays the money borrowed from you and becomes defensive if you ever ask about it because he never had any intention of repaying the money in the first place.
He wants you to abandon your family and friends
He complains every time you do something for your family and friends because he wants not just your complete attention, but all your resources as well. So you should give your money, your time, your energy, your listening ear, but he is never there when you need him. If you give these to anyone else he argues and accuses you of not giving enough to him.
He wouldn’t mind if you work while he relaxes and spends your money
Unfortunately, there are some men who do not value independence at all. In fact, they want to treat your debit and credit cards as well as your property as their own. He also acts entitled to your resources because you are his spouse, or because he “would have done the same”, even though this couldn’t be farther from the truth.
He manipulates (brainwashes) you to the extent that you no longer have a sense of self and independence
Everything you do has to revolve around him and so much of what you do is dependent on him. He will spin every story to fit his needs and is preoccupied with himself. Additionally, in these kinds of interactions, the manipulated party makes excuses for the other partner, explaining away things, and saying why it’s important for the other party to dominate.
He says that if you love him you should willingly give to him without complaining
This is a part of the manipulation game and because he knows that you love him, the “if you love me” card is often brought in. He does this to make you feel that you can only prove that you love him by giving in to his demands.
He calls or is nice to you only when he wants something
He calls you only when he wants something from you, and whenever you spend time together, he always ends up asking you for money, gifts or favours.
