Friends, we have a serious crime problem, and I welcome any reasonable proposal for tackling the monster. However, mi cyaan understand why it seems like the politician (26, 34) who had the security portfolio not so long ago seems to have all the solutions now. Di man mouth (14) flapping non-stop these days. But where were all these great ideas when he was in charge? Too much time at the villa, perhaps?

Mi hear dat a man turn up at di big clinic (33) with some serious wounds on his butt (2, 4) and seh is a hog (7) bite him. One nurse (22) was wondering if him was naked when the attack happened, owing to the depth of the wounds inflicted by the hog’s teeth (1). Other people were wondering why. But mi nah say nothin’.

One obviously madwoman (27) created a stir in the big establishment. Di woman tek set pon other people, including me, and start throw things from her basket at me. But thank God (26 again) mi a praying smaddy: No weapon form against me shall prosper. More time.