MONTEGO BAY, St James — Both Mandela and Esroy Willocks are struggling to come to terms with the death of their younger brother 26-year-old solider Anthony Willocks who is suspected to have committed suicide in his community of Somerton, St James, last Saturday.

According to Esroy, the deceased Willocks began showing signs of depression after they lost their father 12 years ago. Four years later their mother’s death added a tremendous burden to the then 16-year-old Willocks, who shared a deep love for his maternal figure.

“If you go on his Facebook page you can see that he missed his mother and father. Our father died in 2008 and our mother passed away in 2011. He took it really hard,” Esroy said on Wednesday when the Jamaica Observer visited their family home in Somerton.

Esroy stated that, after losing both parents, he along with Mandela shared the responsibility of raising their younger brother, who had big dreams and ambitions.

They told the Observer that the family was extremely proud when the St James High School past student went on to enlist in the Jamaica Defence Force (JDF) four years ago.

“We were really proud of him because our parents drop out when he was young and him really hold up his head. We did proud man. Him did a mek something of himself, so we did happy for him,” said Esroy.

But the young soldier’s days of grief and loss weren’t behind him as he still grappled with depression. Esroy told the Observer that, after the breakdown of his younger brother’s relationship earlier this year, he noticed “a change”.

“Mi know seh after the break-up with the ex-girlfriend, which happened about August, mi notice there was a change in him. Him always look down. He wasn’t himself and he always looked sad,” he said.

“He was always sad,” Esroy added before his voice trailed off.

Though recognising that his brother was once again struggling with loss, Esroy admitted that the conversation never came up because “we a man so we nah go talk bout that”.

“No, mi never really talk to him about it because you know how the army tan, work can be stressing sometimes, so mi never wah add more stress,” Esroy explained.

For Mandela, the eldest of the Willocks brothers, the image of his brother hanging by a rope inside their family’s abandoned house refuses to leave his mind. He was the one who found Willocks’s body on Saturday night.

Mandela said after being alerted that the now-deceased Willocks had sent a video of a rope tied around his neck to his ex-girlfriend, he recognised the house and immediately ran in its direction.

He was too late.

“A me go find him, and right now mi a go through a tough time because a just him inna my head. A just him mi a think bout from Saturday,” Mandela said as he fought back tears.

He continued, “When mi get the message from the ex-girlfriend and mi see seh a up a the house, mi run go up deh and the door was locked. Mi haffi kick off one of the door and mi go in there go see him. Mi call him but him did done gone. Mi haffi run out and start bawl.”

While reminiscing on their last interactions with the deceased soldier, both brothers noted that, though they were aware of his emotional struggles, they did not expect him to commit suicide.

“When he came down on Thursday me and him did a drive up and down a reason about some house and other businesses. Him tell me bout his apartment and seh how him go lef the key with me. Me and him always a reason bout things we wah do,” said Esroy.

“The three of us had plans for the future. We had businesses that we wanted to do. He started an online business where him sell watch and keyrings. We were close. This really come to me as a shocker because mi cya believe seh him really go do that,” Mandela added.

Esroy said he last saw the deceased soldier on the morning of the day he was found dead.

“I saw him when he came to leave the keys to his apartment with me. Him tell mi seh him soon come back. In the night now mi look in my bag and mi see the key. That time mi realise seh him never come back for it, so mi think maybe him gone back a camp. It shocking fi really know seh mi see him the same day before him hang himself,” he said.

Describing their younger brother as “extremely quiet and jovial”, Mandela told the Observer that he has been experiencing difficulties in coping with his death.

“A just him deh pon my brain…a just him mi a think bout. Right now mi a go through a hard time but mi have fi try be strong,” he said.

Members of the JDF visited the family’s home in Somerton on Wednesday to offer condolence and prayers. It is believed that the deceased soldier updated his Facebook bio on Saturday morning before committing suicide, the brothers stated.

It now says, “Rest in heaven, Mom and Dad. I’ll be seeing the both of you soon,” Esroy said.