The day the romance died

WHEN you find yourself stuck in a passionless relationship, living off nothing but feelings of nostalgia, and having grown so bitter because your entire relationship is driven by conflict and your partner does not seem to care about your physical or emotional well-being, you’ll know the romance is dead. When this happens, some people live in regret while others fight to return to the place in their relationship where their partner’s happiness was paramount.

When did you know the romance had died in your relationship?

Sasha:

For me, the romance died when the sex stopped and my other half stopped caring. Most arguments can be healed by a physical connection. If even the desire for that connection goes away, it’s difficult to recover.

Olena:

It was obvious that I had taken second place. This fellow didn’t care that the spark that was once in his eyes when he looked at me was no more. He no longer cared how I spent my free time and he barely wanted anyone to see us in public. This fellow had the audacity one day to tell me that I was no longer his size of choice and that my beauty had faded. That’s when I knew we had hit rock bottom.

Patzy:

We no longer had any connection at all; two days we were fine but the other five I lived through painfully to save face for the kids. It wasn’t love. I knew the romance was dead, there was no love, there was no pillow talk, there was no desire to touch him. In fact I hated him. To this day I just can’t forgive him for cheating and using all his money to care for everyone else except me and the kids.

John B:

We stopped showing affection to each other. We seldom kissed, paid each other compliments, cuddled or exchanged gifts. We were there living individual lives and the only thing that we shared was the same space. We were just as dead as the iceberg that sank the Titanic.

Joe:

We stopped having conversations. We hardly went out, and there was no fire. We never said it, but the writing was on the wall.

Andrea:

I was getting less attention and more excuses. We communicated less, and we argued over trivial stuff, things that we had looked past before. He started accusing me because I guess he knew he was doing those things. I had to resort to searching his phone and even though I saw it with my own eyes, he accused me of lying and he was always ‘working overtime’ and coming in late hours. He even started dressing differently and buying new clothes every week. This is when I know that things could not go back to the way they were before. There was no spark, there was no romance, we were over.

Lisa:

He barely wanted to be around me and he wanted that because he couldn’t answer the calls from the other women while he was around me. There was no intimacy, and even if there was, it was quick. One moment he was on top of me, and the next thing I knew it was over! This made me unhappy. I tried to fix things but it was like I was talking to his shadow he made no effort until our lives came to a standstill and we began living like roommates.