‘I only wanted to be with you’ – On finding closure
A broken relationship without the necessary closure can cause hurt, hatred and emptiness to consume you. For some people these are feelings which persist for years, even into new relationships, and as such the experts will urge that one of the steps in the grieving process should involve introspection, which for some people includes asking your ex questions about what caused the failure.
Below some readers share what they’d ask or say to their exes if given the chance, as they seek closure.
Shanoy:
I would need for him to answer what exactly happened between us. How did we get here? Why did you cheat?
Kimoni:
You could have told me the truth instead of making me believe that I was doing something wrong. It’s unfair the way you treated me when all I ever did was try to see the best in you and hope our relationship would work out somehow. I only wanted to be with you, but you showed me in every way that you weren’t the person I fell for and certainly not the one for me.
Kimmie:
You hurt me in more ways than one; it was not the cheating or the lies or even the emotional abuse, but the words you told me at the altar, the ones we shared as husband and wife. But reality kicked in and you changed. All your promises were based on pretence and the real you began to show. After five years together and only seven months of marriage, I was torn to pieces by anger and hurt, but I had the love of God, my family and my friends that helped me through. I forgave you but I will never forget what you did to me. I now have peace, and as closure, I found love, the one for myself that I did not have when I was with you. I am happy now, and you were just a phase no longer worth the memory.
Antonette:
I am okay with the fact that we are no longer together. I have learnt a lot, but I am grown now and I can move on.
David:
Although I am hurting I hope that you find love and joy in your future relationships, but if not I’ll always be here.
Yonnek:
I’m really sorry and I wish things were different but I hope that you will find it in your heart, body, mind and soul to forgive me. I’ll always love and cherish the moments we shared and you will always have a place in my heart. I love you.
Kiyo:
I would tell him to grow up and stop acting like a child because that’s going to get him nowhere. I would also tell him to take responsibility for his actions and stop leaving himself open to be abused by others. Life is not a one-way street and what you put out determines what you get. Set a high standard for your child to follow and stop acting the fool. After all, you lay down and made a baby, now stand up and be a dad.
