Nice guys don’t last
HAVE you ever gone against your preferences and given someone a chance who you wouldn’t ordinarily have dated, because they seemed nice? Many women are chastised for liking the bad-boy type and for not giving nice guys a chance, and when they get hurt, people will say that it’s because of the choices they made.
But what about when you give these nice guys a chance, then live to regret it?
Shannoy, 26:
I was a single mom, just doing my thing and finishing up my degree. I was going to church again, after finally managing to co-parent with my ex. Life was good. It seemed this vulture could smell the goodness and decided to strike. On the surface he was a good guy, and checked all the boxes – seemed loving, caring, complimentary, and kind. He approached my friend and expressed an interest, and even though he wasn’t my type (chubby, blue collar), my friend said he was nice and encouraged me. We dated for two years and at the end of it I looked like a plucked chicken – lost chunks of my hair and everything. Man put me through the washing machine. What he lacked in looks he replaced with deceit and ego.The worst part was when he told me that I had given him the confidence to approach other pretty women, but he wanted someone who didn’t have kids.
Kay, 32:
I always dated a certain type, and let’s just say my family was less than happy. I got pregnant for one of these men, and my grandmother literally prayed that the Lord would take the baby. Well, I actually ended up having a miscarriage. The way they all celebrated! Anyway, after that they all started playing matchmaker and introducing me to good guys. My older sister introduced me to one of the guys in her group at school. He was OK, very type A. But after my experience I had cooled down a little. I was with him for five months before I had to literally ghost him. He was nice in public, but in our private, intimate space he wanted to do all kinds of things to me that even the devil would be shocked at.
Brittany, 25:
This guy pursued me relentlessly at church, I mean like stalker mode. Finally, I gave him a chance, even though I liked someone else, but that other guy was moving too slow. We hung out for a while, and eventually even started to discuss things like marriage and children. I posted him all over my social media. One day a friend called and asked his last name. I shared it and she said strangely, at her church the Sunday before, the banns of marriage had been announced between him and another girl, and she recognised the name because it was unusual. He told me afterwards that he was dating us both to test who would be the right fit for him.
Shim, 27:
I already had low self-esteem and didn’t know it was possible to go lower. He was the nice tenant next door who I could ask to do anything, and even though I had sworn off men, somehow he won me over. We started dating on the lowdown, and after a while he moved in. Things got bad when I met his family, and from the get-go they hated me because I had kids. He broke up with me, and bought one of the houses in our scheme, and was then elected maintenance manager, so I had to still see him often. I thought we were still cool though, until one day it was pouring rain near the entrance to the scheme, when I got off my taxi. I saw him and hailed him, and he just walked past me like he didn’t know me. He had a huge ‘house and land’ umbrella too, so I could have sheltered easily with him.
Alecia, 30:
Everybody loved him – my kids, parents, even my dog. We got married, had another child, and then one day he said we were all smothering him and he was going to leave Jamaica and pursue his dream of travelling the world before settling down. Lol.
